The Price of Secrecy
by denise1
Summary: A trilogy based on the premise - What if the NID had gotten ahold of Sam before the ashrak
1. The Price of Secrecy

The Price of Secrecy

By

Denise

Jack watched Daniel and Teal'c walk through the gate and sighed, really wishing that he was going with them. "Colonel? General Hammond wanted me to remind you that your flight leaves in an hour," Sargent Davis said over his shoulder. "The staff car to take you to Petersen will leave in thirty minutes."

"Thanks," Jack said, turning and leaving the room. He made his way to his quarters and quickly gathered his bags. The medal ceremony was a late afternoon affaire and they were planning to stay the night before returning to Colorado. He retraced his steps and made his way to the general's office.

"Jack. I'll be just a moment," Hammond said, glancing up from his desk.

"Take your time, sir," Jack replied, setting down his bags. "Take all the time you want. In fact, are you sure there's nothing in there to keep us here? I mean, it's probably not a good idea for both of us to leave at the same time."

"Jack…"

"Maybe I should stay behind, keep an eye on things."

"That's enough," the older man ordered. "Colonel, you've made your feelings on this matter very clear."

"Sir. I'm sorry. And you know I mean no disrespect to you but…this sucks."

"You have an objection to getting the Air Medal for saving the planet?"

"I have an objection to who's NOT getting the medal."

"I know it doesn't seem fair but…"

"Sir. She was there too, stood right beside me. Hell, the commander of the shuttle even let her fly it for crying out loud."

"I'm well aware of Captain Carter's contributions but there's nothing we can do."

"General."

"Colonel, as far at the Air Force is concerned, she's AWOL. And AWOL officers don't receive medals from the President."

"Being AWOL wasn't her idea."

"We've been over this. There is no proof that Captain Carter's disappearance wasn't voluntary."

"Carter wouldn't just run off."

"But the snake in her head might have had different ideas. Frankly, Jack, it's far more likely that she snuck out and ran away than the grand conspiracy idea you were thinking up." The long-standing argument was cut short by an alarm going off, signaling an unauthorized gate activation. Jack dashed out into the briefing room and peered through the large windows. He saw a figure hurrying into the room and up the ramp. "What the hell?" Hammond demanded, standing by his side.

"I don't know, sir. I think someone's trying to hihack the gate."

"The hell they are." Hammond hurried down the stairs, followed by Jack. "Do not allow that person to leave," Jack heard him order. "Use deadly force only if necessary, but I want them stopped."

A few seconds later a shot rang out and Jack saw the person fall to the ramp in a crumpled heap. He dashed down the short flight of steps and into the gateroom, squeezing through the opening blast door. He stepped onto the ramp just as the gate snapped shut. Waving off the SF's, he kneeled by the person, gently rolling them over.

"Get medical down here," Hammond ordered.

"Oh my god," Jack said, as the face of the person was revealed. He reached out to check her pulse. Relieved to find one, Jack let the medics push him aside, still staring at the unconscious woman. "She's not AWOL anymore," he said to his commanding officer as the medics loaded Sam Carter onto the gurney.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Doc?" Jack asked, looking up as the woman walked into the briefing room. Both he and General Hammond had been busy dealing with the consequences of a base security breech and a previously AWOL captain literally showing up on their doorstep.

"She's alive. And still a host," the woman reported. "The gunshot wound was minor and on a normal human I'd say it'd heal in a couple of weeks." She stopped letting the implication that a goa'ulded person would heal faster sink in. "What concerns me, sirs, is what else I found."

"Doctor?"

"General, Captain Carter's body has scars from three other gunshot wounds, also a large area that appears to be a healed burn. She's malnourished and generally not in very good health."

"What are you trying to say, doc?"

"What I'm saying, colonel, is that she didn't have any of these scars six months ago. She also didn't have these." The woman laid a couple of Polaroid pictures on the table. Jack picked one up and frowned.

"What am I looking at?" He squinted at the close up of an arm, the pale skin at the wrists marred by dull red lines.

"Those are scars, sir. Some older than others. They're consistent with rope burns or some other sort of restraint. There are similar marks on her ankles. Going by the physical evidence, General, my opinion is that the captain has been a prisoner for the last several months. And I would say not treated very nicely either."

George sighed and shook his head. "I wish I could say this was unexpected," he said heavily.

"Sir?"

"Jack. I personally considered the captain's absence an involuntary one. And given how diligently the NID have pursued gaining access to Teal'c, I didn't think it was unlikely for them to be interested in a host. I just couldn't prove anything."

"What are we going to do now?" Janet asked softly.

"Doctor?"

"Sir, if it was the NID that…hurt her, if they know that she's here and that she's still a host, they'll come."

"She's right, General," Jack agreed, silently urging his commanding officer to make the right decision. Although disgusted at the idea that his friend still had a snake in her head, the thought that she had most likely been tortured for the last several months, and faced the prospect of it happening again was making him ill. There were very few people in the universe that he would wish that fate on, and his second in command wasn't one of them.

Hammond sighed and scrubbed his hands over his broad face. "I don't see how we'll be able to keep this a secret. A dozen people know already. However," he said in response to the mutinous looks on their faces. "If you can get me some kind of proof, something to take to the President," he suggested.

"Sir, if the emotional trauma she's been through is anything like the physical trauma, it could take months of therapy before Captain Carter is emotionally able to deal with what happened."

"You better hope not, doctor. Because I don't think we have that long," Hammond said, looking at her pointedly.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack stood beside Janet and stared into the room. The doctor had had the foresight to put Sam in a private room just off to the side of the normal infirmary. His friend was lying on the narrow bed, an IV adorning one arm. Jack could see leather restraints securing her wrists to the bed rails. "Is that really necessary?" he asked Janet.

"She was strong enough to throw you across the room last time," Janet reminded.

"Did they aah, did they do anything else?" he asked, shifting from one foot to the other.

"No. At least not that I can tell. However, if she was assaulted months ago, there wouldn't be much of an indication left. I would presume the symbiote would protect against disease and heal any bruises."

Jack sighed and scratched his head. His eyes caught a bit of movement and he straightened his back. "She's awake," he said quietly.

Janet glanced at her watch. "I didn't expect her to regain consciousness for hours."

"Snakes can shake off sedatives. It took a triple dose to take her down last time," Jack said, remembering when they'd discovered that Sam had been possessed by a goa'uld six months ago. Reaching a decision, he grabbed the doorknob and entered the room shaking off the doctor's restraining hand.

He crossed the room, coming to a stop beside Sam's bed. "Hey, Carter. Nice of you to come back and visit," he said, keeping his voice even and calm. "You know, if you'd have called ahead we'd have baked a cake or something." With her eyes closed, she turned her head, turning her back on him, as much as she could.

Listening to his instinct, he reached down and carefully undid the restraints, gently lifting her wrist free and laying it across her stomach. His friend had always been slight, now he could see how the doc had come up with the diagnosis of malnutrition. He rounded the bed and freed her other arm. "I tell ya what, Carter. I'll make you a deal. No one knows that you're here, and we want to keep it that way. I'm gonna get Ferretti to hang outside the door. You need anything, you ask him and he'll get it for you, anything you want. You're safe here," he assured her. He stood beside her bed for a few more minutes, then turned and left, careful to shut but not lock the door.

"Do you really think that's smart, sir?" Janet asked quietly.

Jack shrugged. "If we want her to trust us, we have to trust her first. We keep her restrained, we're as bad as the people that hurt her."

"And if she tries to break out and go for the gate again?"

"I don't think that's gonna happen," Jack said, nodding towards the window. In the room, Sam had shifted a bit and rolled over on her side, her back to the door.

"How'd you know?"

"That's how she used to sleep off-world," he explained.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

'He seems nicer than last time,' Jolinar said to her host, deadening the nerves to reduce the pain from their latest wound.

'He's just doing his job,' she responded. 'Good cop, bad cop. The NID will be here to get us soon.'

Jolinar winced at the cynicism in her host's 'voice'. That, among other things, had changed in Samantha Carter in the last few months. 'He said they didn't tell them.'

'And you believe him?'

'I've believed all along that they had nothing to do with our…capture.'

'Given the security of this base, you think it was possible for someone to just waltz in, kidnap us and sneak out, without anyone noticing? I didn't know Tok'ra were that naïve.'

'We managed to sneak in,' Jolinar reminded. 'And we nearly made it through the stargate.'

'We should have waited until the colonel and the general were gone. Third shift, it's always the slowest,' Sam said.

'We couldn't wait. You said the guard recognized you.'

'I said I thought he recognized me. There are five hundred people on this base; they can't know every one. It doesn't matter anyway,' Sam said, her 'voice' dejected. 'They'll send us back. It'll start all over.'

'No, it won't,' Jolinar soothed.

'Liar.'

'Sleep,' the symbiote said, sighing internally, giving up the argument. Taking liberties, she manipulated her host's seratonin level, easing her way into a healing slumber. Within minutes, the human was unconscious, leaving the symbiote to think over their situation, unencumbered by her host's dark thoughts.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack sat at a console in the control room, watching the small TV monitor. Sensing a presence he turned, and started to get to his feet. Then general waved him to remain seated. "Any change?"

Jack shook his head. "No, sir. Doc says that she's asleep." He turned back to the monitor, again staring at the woman in the bed. Carter hadn't moved since the first time, still curled up on her side in a relaxed fetal position.

"The two techs she knocked out have agreed not to say anything," the general said quietly. "The same with the nurses and medics. Most of them were here six months ago so they remember her disappearance."

"What about?" Jack tapped the screen.

"Unfortunately, we have a tape machine that isn't working properly. It should take the technicians at least a week to discover and fix the problem," the general said meaningfully. They both stared at the black and white screen for a few minutes then the older man sighed. "Jack, as much as I want to believe otherwise, I doubt we'll be able to keep her presence here a secret for much more than a few days to a week. We never did find the spy last time."

"I know."

"If they come with the proper papers, I won't be able to stop them from taking her with them."

"I know that too."

"I need proof, Jack. Fraiser's reports are good, but not conclusive. If I had Captain Carter's sworn testimony, it would help a lot."

"You're assuming that Carter's still in there. That the snake isn't using her memories to fool us like last time."

"Jack, do you honestly think that?"

Jack sighed. "I don't know."

"Talk to her," Hammond ordered. "See if you can either reason with the goa'uld or get Carter to talk. If she could give me a name, then I'd have some ammunition to at least keep her here until we decide what to do." The general sighed. "I can't believe I'm suggesting this but…maybe you should take her out of here."

"General?" Jack asked, not quite believing what he was hearing. "You're suggesting that I take a goa'uld out of this facility?"

"I'm suggesting that the less people that know, the easier a secret is to keep. Talk to Fraiser, find out if she can be moved."

Jack got to his feet. "Any suggestion where?"

"How can I suggest a location if I don't know what you're doing," he said grimly. "Which is exactly what I'll tell anyone that asks."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack walked into the infirmary; setting down the bag he was carrying. He shook his head at a sleepy looking Ferretti who'd taken up a station outside Sam's door. The man started to stand and Jack motioned for him to remain seated. "Nobody's come, Colonel. Other than the doc," he reported.

"Thanks, Ferretti. I appreciate it." Jack patted the man on his shoulder. "You look beat. Go, get some sleep."

"I'm fine, sir," he protested.

"No," Jack insisted. "You need to go get some rest." He raised his eyebrows meaningfully.

"Oh. Right. I am bushed. I should go and…sleep," the major said, catching on.

Jack smiled encouragingly. He watched the man go, and then walked into Sam's room, closing the door behind him. "Carter?" he called softly, not wanting to startle her.

The figure in the bed stirred and slowly rolled over, blinking sleepily. "Colonel O'Neill. I was hoping you would come." She sat up, wincing as she propped herself up on the pillows.

"Carter?" he asked again, taking a step back.

"My name is Jolinar. I am the symbiote residing in the body of Samantha Carter," she said, her voice resonating slightly.

"Aah. Well. Nice to…meet you," he said, his face wrinkling in a frown. Well, that answered the question about whether or not the snake was still active.

"We did not have much time to speak the last time I was here," she said.

"No. We…didn't. Where's Carter?" he asked, more than a bit taken aback at hearing his friend's voice speaking for some…thing else.

"She is…asleep for lack of a better word." She smiled slightly. "I was hoping to speak to you privately."

"You can do that? Just…block her out?"

"It is not something we normally do, but yes, we can block the host from receiving stimuli. It is something I have become well versed at in recent months," she said.

"What happened?"

"We were incarcerated in your holding cell. Someone came in and shot us with a tranquilizer dart. I do not recall much of what transpired after that. The next fully cognizant thought I had was being in another cell, in the state of…Nevada I believe it is called."

"What about Carter?"

"What about her?"

"What does she remember?"

"She remembers even less than I do. Colonel O'Neill, you have to understand. For several days she fought me, quite admirably I must admit. She only accepted our blending as a defense against the experiments."

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend," Jack muttered.

She quirked her head and frowned. "A curious phrase, but accurate. As the …sessions grew more intense, she began to seek refuge in the oblivion I could offer her."

Jack shook his head. "What?"

"Not only can I block the host from receiving stimuli, I can also block her memories. Her mind still processes events, she witnesses them, however she doesn't remember that she witnesses them. It is not an act we like to do. We prefer to share experiences with our hosts, however, Samantha found our time most trying. I came to believe that her sanity was in danger, so I did what I could to protect her."

Jack thought for a second. "Ok. Not that I'm not grateful for that but…if we have any hope of finding out who did this to you…two, we need to know what happened, from HER."

"Forcing her to remember would likely not have a pleasant outcome," Jolinar said. "It would be best if it were a process that took time."

Jack shook her head. "Time is something we DON'T have. Someone told the NID that you were here six months ago, and it's just a matter of time before they find out again."

"So she is right," Jolinar said softly.

"What?"

"She believes that our return to the facility is unavoidable and that you and your leader will facilitate our return to your NID."

"No. We had nothing to do with it. The NID can't come get you if they can't find you," he said to her puzzled look. "If I get you out of here, will you promise not to run away?" Jack asked, not quite believing what he was proposing.

"Colonel O'Neill?"

"We figure we have hours, maybe days before the NID finds out what's happened. If you're here, you'll be easy to find…"

"And if we are not here we will be harder to find," she finished.

"Yeah."

"You have my word, colonel. We will not try to escape you. However, if a danger presents itself, I will do whatever necessary to protect myself and Samantha," she said, fixing him with a steely gaze.

Jack nodded, accepting her terms. "Ok." He got to his feet and left the room, returning a few seconds later with a sack of items he'd stashed around the corner. "Get dressed. I'm going to have a little chat with Fraiser, then we're leaving."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jolinar sat in the passenger's seat of Colonel O'Neill's truck, watching with fascination as the scenery sped by. The planet of the Tau'ri was an interesting one. In some ways they were incredibly advanced, in others horribly primitive. They had a highly developed ground transportation system, yet air travel was limited.

Inside her host railed, furious at her for leaving the SGC and placing her trust in O'Neill. Privately, the Tok'ra was pleased to feel her host's anger. It was the most spirit she'd experienced in months. Her host had been withdrawing more and more, and it concerned her. At first, Samantha had wanted nothing more than for Jolinar to leave her, now she'd become almost totally dependant. At first she'd thought she was doing Samantha a favor by shielding her from the experiments, but now she knew she'd made a mistake. On the surface her host accepted the blending, but in the depths of her mind, she resented her presence. A resentment that would only grow to hatred. The same way her fear and pain had grown into anger towards her former commanders.

"Where are we going?" she asked, startling the colonel a bit. They'd been driving in near silence for an hour or so.

"A friend of Hammond's, he owns a cabin up in the mountains."

'No witnesses. Easier to dispose of the body,' Sam snapped internally. Jolinar had removed her block as they had dressed, informing her host of their plans. The woman had been less than enthused. In fact, she'd been down right livid. Her distrust of her former co-workers had reached an almost pathological level. Something Jolinar knew couldn't continue. She had the advantage of two millennia of experience and objectivity to know that Samantha's friends weren't to blame. She just had to convince her host of that fact.

"You still believe that there is a spy at the SGC?" Jolinar said, more for Sam's benefit than for her own.

"Somebody told the NID about her…you. Somebody circumvented base security. And contrary to what Carter thinks, it wasn't George and I," he said, glancing over. "We were trying to cover it up."

'Yeah, right.'

"I must warn you, colonel. Samantha does not want to be here. When we arrive at the cabin, I will return control to her. She will most likely not be pleasant to be around."

'Stop talking about me like I'm not here. I can hear you, you know.'

Jack grimaced. "Fun. One thing I don't get, why are you doing this?" he asked, turning off the main road.

"Doing what?"

"This. Basically helping me kidnap Carter."

"You said it yourself, Colonel. You need her words to uncover the spy."

'The spy is three feet away from us.'

"When you were caught, you were trying to get off the planet. What do you care if we catch a spy?" he countered.

"What is to say that is my only motivation? The Tau'ri are potential allies, your success against Apophis standing as an example."

Jack shook his head. "That's too easy. There has to be more," he protested, pulling into a short driveway and parking beside a small stone cabin.

"Perhaps," she said mysteriously. "This is it?"

"Yeah. I know it doesn't look like much but…"

'NO! Don't you dare. Don't you leave me alone with him.'

"Then I will say goodbye, Colonel," she interrupted. She relinquished control to her host, ignoring her protests, gratefully slipping back into the recesses of her mind.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack watched as Sam slumped, her arms going out to catch herself. She raised her head and he nearly winced at the naked hate in her eyes. She reached for the door handle, her other hand fumbling for the seat belt release.

"Carter…" he reached out to stop her.

"NO." She shook off his hand. "Don't touch me." She released the seat belt and opened the door, sliding down from the truck's seat. Jack saw her stagger a bit, then start to run back down the road they'd just driven up.

Muttering a few choice curses, he jumped out of the truck, chasing after her. He caught her easily, grabbing one arm to stop her flight. She cried out and staggered, falling to her knees, her free arm clutching at her left side. Jack let go of her arm and stood over her, breathing heavily. "What's wrong?" he asked.

She ignored him, shifting her position on the ground, hunching over as if in pain.

Impatient with her attitude, he knelt down, pulling her hand away from her side. Her palm was smeared with blood. "You tore your stitches, didn't you?" he asked.

"Leave me alone." She pulled her hand from his.

"You're bleeding."

"Jolinar will fix it."

"No. She won't," Jack said. "She's gone, as close to gone as she'll get while still in your head." He pulled her to her feet. "Let's go inside. Fraiser gave me some supplies to change the dressing."

She pulled her arm from his grasp. "I'm fine," she said, breathing heavily.

"Bleed if that's what you want. But you're doing it inside," he said, taking her free arm again, this time holding on tighter. He walked back to the cabin, pulling her behind him.

Digging the key from his pocket, he opened the door and went inside. The cabin was small consisting of a living/dining room/kitchen, two small bedrooms and a tiny bath. It had running water and electricity, but no telephone or TV. The furnishings were simple, and sturdy, two large couches and what looked to be a home made coffee table centered around a stone fireplace. The appliances in the kitchen were old looking, but clean. The refrigerator was small, about five feet tall and the stove was one of those that Jack knew could cook dinner, but lacked the finesse for anything fancy.

Jack led Sam to the couch and gently pushed her down upon the cushions. "Stay," he ordered.

"I'm not staying here," she said, trying to rise.

"Yes, you are, Captain." He accentuated her rank. "Fraiser also sent along some tranquilizers, don't make me use them." He met her gaze, staring until she shook her head and looked away.

Knowing that it wouldn't take her long to recover from losing the battle of wills, he turned, making quick work of bringing in their supplies and clothing.

She stayed curled up on the couch as he put a simple dinner of canned stew to warm on the stove and started a fire in the hearth. From the pinched look on her face, he guessed that her injury had to be hurting her. He went into the kitchen and came back, a packet of pills and a glass of water in his hand. "Here," he said, holding them out. She shook her head, refusing his offer. "It's still bleeding isn't it?" he asked, seeing the dark patch on her gray sweatshirt.

"She'll fix it."

"If you say so. Personally, this isn't my cabin. And I have a funny feeling that Hammond's friend isn't gonna be too happy to come up here and find blood all over his furniture," he said.

She stared at him for a minute, and then slumped, nodding slightly. He reached down and picked up the large first aid kit Fraiser had sent with them. Sitting beside her on the couch, he reached over and pulled up her sweatshirt, revealing a blood soaked bandage. Putting on gloves, he peeled back the bandage, wincing a bit at the sight of torn stitches.

She was lucky, only a couple had come free, something easily fixed with butterfly bandages. It took him a few minutes to finish his task, and by then he could smell the stew bubbling on the stove.

"I think dinner's ready," he said, leaning back so she could pull down her shirt. "And don't tell me you're not hungry. Come on." She frowned. "Unless you like eating with blood all over your hands." She followed him into the kitchen, washing while he served up the stew. He handed her one bowl then led the way back to the living room. She sat down, deliberately staying as far away from him as she could.

She ate slowly and deliberately, occasionally shooting him narrow eyed glances. When she was finished, she set the bowl on the table and got to her feet. She walked down the short hall and he heard the door to the smaller of the two bedrooms shut. Setting down his half eaten bowl of soup he leaned back with a sigh. One thing certainly hadn't changed about his teammate; she was still as stubborn as ever.

Abandoning his dinner, he went into the kitchen and started a pot of coffee. He didn't trust the snake when she said she was withdrawing, although the fact that Carter's wound still wasn't healed seemed to support that. Torn between trust and distrust, he sought refuge in the one thing that had been a constant for nearly twenty years, carry out his orders and let the rest sort itself out.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Leering faces, cold voices. Dispassionate hands taking measurements as she shivered. A barren, gray room, the clang of a heavy door. Endless questions, then silence. Hating the sound of his voice, then desperate for it. Bruising hands. The thunderous report of a gun, echoing off the walls, the curious, appraising looks on their faces as they watched her bleed. The sting of needles sliding into her skin, the pain of chemicals burning through her veins.

She was nothing to them, simply a subject. No one would talk to her, only about her. Desperate for conversation, for protection, she turned to the only ally she had, making a fragile peace with the creature in her head.

Two victims formed an alliance, supporting each other through the experiments.

Disassociating from the physical world, one protected the other, allaying her guilt while the other hid. Terrifying experiences became nebulous dreams. Easy to ignore, easy to forget. Until those faint, wispy dreams took solid form, lurking around the edge of the room like a demon. Memories assaulted her, rising up like inexorable floodwaters, impossible to stop, moving too fast to run away from. Swiftly, she was over taken and pulled under, helpless in the deluge.

Drenched in sweat, Sam sat up in bed, her heart pounding in her chest. She gasped for breath, unrealized tears streaming down her face. Horrifying memories filled her brain, catalogued in ruthless detail. Events of the last six months spilled forth. Blurred and hazy images came into focus.

The door crashed open and she screamed, instinctively reaching for the covers. "Carter? You ok?" Speechless, she could only nod. He frowned, lowering the zat he was carrying. "What's wrong?" he asked gently, moving closer to her bed.

"I remember," she whispered. "I remember it all."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack handed Sam a mug of coffee, liberally laced with whisky from the cabinet and took a seat on the other couch. "Thanks," she said, wrapping her hands around the thick mug.

She breathed in the steam, closing her eyes and taking a careful sip. His eyes settled on the ragged red lines ringing her wrists. He had similar scars of his own and knew exactly how hard she'd fought the restraints to get them.

"So…Nevada?" he prompted, sliding his hand into his pocket to turn on the small tape recorder he'd brought along.

Her face fell a bit and she lowered the mug. "Yeah. Although I didn't know for sure until we…left." She took a deep breath. "It wasn't bad, at the beginning. After we woke up, they just asked us questions. Normal interrogation stuff. They wanted to know about the Tok'ra. Jolinar wouldn't talk and I didn't know. That lasted a few days. When they couldn't get tactical information out of us, they settled for something more basic." She looked him in the eyes. "Our cell would get cold. Really, really cold." She shivered in memory. "They didn't ask any questions, just took notes. Then it got hot."

"Testing your tolerances," he said.

She nodded. "Heat, cold, hunger, thirst…all the basics. Then they got creative," she said bitterly. "One morning a guard came in. He shot us." Her hand strayed to her chest and she swallowed. "They just stood there and watched us bleed." Her hands shook as she took another sip of her coffee.

"The burn?"

She nodded. "The same. But, things started to change. It was taking Jolinar longer and longer to heal us. Maybe she was doing it on purpose to slow them down, I don't know. They did drugs next."

"Drugs?"

"Some were narcotics, I think. Others…just made us sick."

"How'd you get out?" Jack asked, trying to keep his voice calm, trying not to show the outrage he felt at his friend's treatment. Things like Carter was describing happened, as he knew all too well. But your tormentors were supposedly to be your enemies, not your comrades in arms, the people you were taught to trust.

She smiled bitterly. "They weren't near as smart as they thought they were." Jack shot her a sharp look. "We played broken," she explained, her voice hinting to him that little acting had been involved. "Eventually they underestimated us. We got out," she said, frowning a bit. "I aah, I think we killed someone," she said softly staring off into the distance.

"What?"

"He tried to stop us. He wasn't going to stop us, no one was going to stop us." Jack stared at his friend, frowning at the haunted look in her eyes. He recognized the note of desperation in her voice, it had once been in his own.

"How'd you get to Colorado?" he asked, breaking her contemplation of the far wall.

"Hitchhike, walk…we even hopped a freight train for a little bit. You'd be surprised how easy it is to get around."

"Why'd you come back?"

"What?"

"If you thought that Hammond and I turned you in, why'd you come to the one place where you'd be recognized? You could have just, disappeared."

"She wants to go home," Sam said.

"Jolinar?"

"That's all she's ever wanted, to go home. And the SGC is the only place to do that."

"They got a gate at Nellis."

"With no power source and no dialing computer. It might as well be a paperweight. The SGC gate was our only chance. I just didn't realize how much General Hammond had beefed up security since we hijacked the gate," she said, making a rueful face.

Jack frowned, a thought occurring to him. "If Jolinar goes home…"

"I'm going with her," she interrupted.

"Excuse me?"

"I'm not staying here."

"Your life, your career is here," he argued.

"WAS here. I don't have a career anymore; I don't even have a life. What?" She set her coffee mug down on the table with a heavy thunk. "You think I'm going to stay here and spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder, waiting for the NID to decide it's time for another round? "

"That's not going to happen. Hammond…"

"Hammond couldn't stop it last time, what makes you think he'll have any more luck this time?" She got to her feet. "Jolinar is leaving, and I'm going with her."

Jack jumped up, walking over to her. "Carter, Sam, we can protect you, Hammond can protect you," he promised.

She shook her head. "You can't protect me. None of you can protect me. They'll find me and they'll come and it'll start all over again. Then when they run out of tests, they'll put me on a slab and carve me up and there'll be pieces of me floating in formaldehyde. And then someday when the SGC is declassified, they'll write a paper on me. Biological ramifications of sentient parasitical infestation or something else as catchy."

"I promise you, they won't get you again," Jack said sincerely.

"Don't make promises you can't or won't keep." She turned away, facing out the window. It was totally dark outside, turning the window more into a mirror, reflecting the room behind her.

"When have I broken a promise?" he asked. She ignored him, still pretending to stare out the window. "Sam?" He took her arm and turned her to face him. "When have I broken a promise?" he asked again.

"What happened to no one gets left behind?" she asked.

"What?"

"We…I kept waiting but you never came."

Jack shook his head. "I don't…"

"The NID has been trying to get a hold of Teal'c for years. They almost started an intergalactic war to keep the Tollans and you never once THOUGHT that they might be involved?" she demanded, her voice rising. "It doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure it out."

"We did think that the NID was involved, at least I did."

"Then…"

"We also thought that you might have walked out of there under your own power, which means we couldn't accuse the NID of taking you because if we did that, we'd have to tell them that there was a goa'uld running loose. They didn't know about you, Sam." He grabbed her shoulders, making her face him. "We kept your…condition a secret. To accuse them or to confront them would have only proved their suspicisions. We tried to look for you, but we couldn't let them KNOW that we were looking for you."

Jack's cell phone rang, shattering the stillness of the cabin. They stared at each other for a minute, until Sam looked down and pulled away. "Hadn't you better get that?" She walked across the room, picking up her mug and headed towards the small kitchenette.

Jack sighed and pulled the phone from his pocket, turning off the tape recorder at the same time. "O'Neill?…What? Well how the hell did that happen? Yeah, we'll be right there." He hung up the phone, turning to face Sam. "We need to go back."

"There's a big surprise. Let me guess, my ride is there."

"No," he said, ignoring the bitterness in her voice. "Daniel and Teal'c were visiting Kasuf on Abydos. Ferretti went to go get them, they ran into a goa'uld." He shook his head. "I don't know. Anyway, Ferretti and Teal'c made it back, Daniel's missing. We gotta go."

"Oh my god," she muttered. "Umm…I'll be packed in a minute." She headed back to the bedroom. Jack watched her go, then sighed, running his hands through his short hair. When the hell had it all gotten so complicated?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"It all happened fast, colonel," Ferretti reported. "We came through the gate, Heru'ur was there. He was arguing with Apophis. There was a firefight, the next thing we knew Heru'ur was dead and Apophis had grabbed Doctor Jackson. They went through the gate," the major said. "I'm sorry, sir. We should have reacted better but…I thought Abydos was safe."

"That's what we all thought," Jack said, absolving the man. "Did you see where they went?"

Ferretti shook his head. "No, sir. They used one of those stun grenades you described. Wouldn't they go to Chulak?"

"No," Sam spoke up for the first time in the briefing. She'd hesitated to do so before, not wanting to draw attention to herself, and the fact that she wasn't supposed to be there. "Apophis has pretty much abandoned Chulak. He keeps a garrison there but he moved his base elsewhere."

"Why would he do that, Captain?" Hammond asked.

"He's been defeated there three times in the past year. It looks bad," Sam said, drawing upon Jolinar's memories. The symbiote had returned from her self-imposed banishment, healing most of the wound on Sam's side. One thing they both agreed on was that Jolinar needed to keep things low key and remain in the background.

"Apophis has many holdings," Teal'c said. "He could have moved to one of several palaces." Although still recovering from his injuries, the Jaffa had insisted upon attending the briefing. And if Sam remembered her friend correctly, he'd insist upon going on the rescue mission as well.

"He's on Vasra," Sam said gaining her sharp looks from the other people around the table.

"How do you know that?" Ferretti asked.

Sam met Jack's gaze and stared at him meaningfully, hoping that he'd get her silent message. "The captain's got her sources," he said. "You got the address to this Vasra?"

Sam nodded. "I do."

"General?"

"I hesitate to send my people into a situation blindly."

"Sir," Sam said. "Vasra is a tiny planet. There should be a squadron of Jaffa and human slaves. He moved there several months ago. It's almost like he didn't want people to know where he was and was trying to be low key," she said. "A small group should have no problem infiltrating the compound and rescuing Daniel."

"Colonel?" Hammond asked. "It's your call."

"Carter says we can do it, we can do it," Jack said, the tone of his voice speaking to his inner battle. Sam knew that he didn't trust her, but also that she had the only lead to finding Daniel.

"We should not tarry," Teal'c said. "The longer we wait, the greater the chances that Apophis will move to another palace."

"We can be ready to go in half an hour," Jack said, seeking the man's permission.

"Very well, you have a go." The older man got to his feet, his actions mimicked by the other people in the room. He turned and went into his office.

"Teal'c?" Jack asked.

"I am capable of going on this mission, O'Neill," the Jaffa interrupted him.

"Ok." Jack nodded.

"I want to go too, sir," Ferretti said.

"Ferretti…"

"Colonel, it was my fault Doctor Jackson was taken…"

"It was Daniel's fault he was taken, it was his idea to go to Abydos in the first place. But, go with Teal'c," he relented. "We leave in half an hour. Carter, a word."

Ferretti and Teal'c left the room and Jack motioned for Sam to step closer. "Is he really on Vasra?"

"Yes. Sir, I wouldn't lie to you, not about this."

"Not three hours ago you were telling me that that snake in your head was going to do anything, ANYTHING to get off world. Now, coincidentally, you just happen to know where Apophis took Daniel?"

"Look, sir. I know how it looks, but Jolinar knows. She's known for months. That was part of the intelligence she was trying to get back to the Tok'ra when her host was killed."

"And when we have him back? Are you going to come back with us?"

Sam broke his gaze and looked out the window at the Stargate below. "I don't know," she said honestly. "I promise you that we'll do whatever we can to get Daniel back." She turned back to face him, her eyes flaring. "You have my word, Colonel," Jolinar said softly.

"Don't make me regret this," Jack threatened, just as softly. "Half an hour, Captain," he said louder.

"Yes, sir," she answered, then turned and left the room.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Daniel sat with his back against the wall, idly watching the small rodent root around in the hay for something to eat. The small creature was his sole roommate in the cell, a fact he didn't really mind. Surprisingly, they didn't take his watch so he knew exactly how long he'd sat in the depressing room. Twelve hours. That bothered him. Not that he'd been a prisoner for twelve hours, but that no one had attempted to interrogate him.

He didn't really mind that either, he was well versed in goa'uld interrogation techniques and would gladly postpone reliving the experience for a long, long time.

What he did mind was the boredom.

He replayed the events of the last day, trying to figure out where it all went so wrong. He should have went straight back to Earth with Shau'ri. That would have been the smart thing to do. No. No, that would have been a mistake. Not after what happened to Sam. He couldn't do that to his wife. Hell, they didn't even know if Sam was still alive. He couldn't risk the same thing happening to Shau'ri.

Sighing he looked at his watch. Twelve hours and three minutes.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack followed Sam and Teal'c through the underbrush, hearing Ferretti at his side. It was nighttime on Vasra and the planet's heavy foliage blocked what little moonlight the planet had. The weight of the night vision goggles annoyed him, but he knew he'd be even more annoyed if he was fumbling around in the dark.

As soon as they had stepped through the gate, Carter, or rather Jolinar, had taken the lead. So far, their intelligence had proven accurate. They'd met little resistance at the gate and none since they'd entered the forest. Oddly enough, neither Teal'c or Ferretti had voiced any concern about Carter being a host. Teal'c he knew, bought the whole Tok'ra thing.

Ferretti, on the other hand, seemed to simply accept the captain as she was. Of course, the major had yet to see Carter's eyes glow either.

Teal'c held up his hands and the quartet stopped. Jack eased his way forward. "Whatcha got?" he whispered.

"The palace," he pointed out. Jack pulled off his goggles, squinting until his eyes adjusted. Palace was a misnomer, the structure looked more like a decent sized mansion to him. Torches lined the three story tall walls and various lanterns shone out the windows. A large wall surrounded the compound, giving it an air of invincibility.

"There's a passage under the walls," Sam said. "It comes out in the dungeons."

"Are you sure?" Jack asked.

"Yes," Sam nodded.

"OK," Jack said. "You got point."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The rattle of keys in the door dragged Daniel from his light doze. Fueled by a burst of adrenaline, he got to his feet and backed against the wall. Two Jaffa entered the room and he meekly let them grab his arms and drag him from the cell.

They led him through a maze of corridors, arriving in an ornate throne room. The walls were adorned with rich ruby red curtains while the floor was a cream marble. Four columns supported the vaulted ceiling and numerous torches on iron stands ringed the chamber, filling the room with both warmth and light.

Apophis sat upon a gilded throne and Daniel was dragged forward, thrown predictably to his knees. The Jaffa stayed at his side, holding his arms and preventing him from moving.

"Tau'ri," he drawled, getting to his feet. "Who told you that Amaunet would be on Abydos?"

"No one," Daniel said.

"Where is my child?" he demanded.

"I don't know."

Apophis walked around him, his steps slow. Daniel fought the urge to turn his head and follow the goa'uld's progress. A rough hand grabbed his head, the fingers threading through his hair. His head was pulled painfully back, leaving his throat exposed. "You do know," Apophis insisted. He drew his ribbon-encased fingers across Daniel's exposed jugular vein. "And you will tell me."

"I can't tell you what I don't know," Daniel insisted.

The jewel in the center of Apophis' ribbon device flared into life. "You will tell me," he said confidently. "Or you will die."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Teal'c led the quartet through the narrow, dank passageways of the dungeon. Just like Captain Carter had said, the tunnel led into a small storeroom at one end of the bank of cells. He had seen similar tunnels in some of Apophis' other holdings. They were originally meant to be a last ditch means of escape for Apophis, but were more commonly used to sneak prostitutes into and out of the dungeons.

The cells were empty, which was consistent with Captain Carter's, or more accurately, Jolinar's, intelligence. He knew that his friend was still blended, even before O'Neill had told him. Part of being a Jaffa was the ability to…feel the presence of other Jaffa and goa'uld. He felt torn in a way. A part of him railed at allying himself with and trusting a goa'uld, the other part was in awe of the fact that he was at the side of a legend come true.

The Tok'ra were often nebulous enemies, something ineffectual goa'uld or Jaffa would blame their failures on. Most goa'uld refused to acknowledge that they existed as an organized fighting force, and so any Jaffa that blamed a failure on the Tok'ra was looked upon with much derision.

Reaching the cell closest to the exit to the dungeon, he paused, allowing O'Neill to come forward. "Daniel?" the man whispered harshly. Receiving no response, he turned on the flashlight attached to the barrel of his gun and shined it around the cell. "No one's home."

"He is probably being interrogated," Sam, or more likely Jolinar, said.

O'Neill nodded grimly and jerked his head, silently ordering Teal'c forward.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Apophis watched dispassionately as the human gasped, struggling against the overwhelming pain of the ribbon device. Seeing his eyes starting to roll back in his head, he paused, the beam of light fading. "Tell me, Tau'ri, where is my son?"

"Don't…know," he whispered hanging limp in the Jaffa's supporting hands.

"Then I shall return to Abydos and kill every man, woman and child until my son is returned to me," Apophis promised. He raised his hand again, this time to finish the human and stopped as loud bangs filled the room. Reacting with preternatural instincts, he instead armed his personal shield and took a defensive step back.

Before his eyes, his two Jaffa jerked and fell, taking the human with them into one large tangled heap of limbs.

"Hold it right there, pops," a voice called out. He raised his gaze to see three members of the Tau'ri step from behind the pillars.

"Move away from him," the female ordered, her insolent voice grating on his sensibilities.

"Tau'ri, you will die," Apophis promised, reaching for his summoning device.

"I believe it is you that shall die," a deep, familiar voice said as a shaft of pain pierced the back of his neck. Unable to control his body, Apophis fell, his eyes lighting upon the figure of Teal'c standing over him, a blood stained knife in his hand. "For my family," was the last words Apophis heard as he, then his host died.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack stared in amazement as Apophis fell, a victim of Teal'c's knife. "For my family," the Jaffa said before wiping the gore-stained knife off on Apophis' robes and shoving it back into the sheath at his waist.

"Doctor Jackson?" Jack turned to see Ferretti pulling the dead Jaffa off of Daniel. "Daniel. Are you ok?" Ferretti knelt at his side. "He's alive, sir. But we need to get him back."

"Ok. Teal'c, if you're done killing people, can you give Ferretti a hand with Daniel. Let's get out of here before something else happens."

Teal'c stepped over his former master's corpse walking past Sam and Jack. Sam knelt by the corpse and reached for Apophis' hand. Jack watched her efficiently strip the ribbon device off the Goa'uld's hand. "Doing a little shopping," he quipped as she fixed the device on her own hand.

"This is quieter than guns," she said, getting to her feet. "And there's a squadron of Jaffa, less two, between us and the gate."

"O'Neill?" Teal'c and Ferretti had Daniel supported between them, the man's arms over their shoulders.

"Don't make me regret letting you have that thing," Jack warned quietly. "Ok. Let's go," he said, walking past them to the door they'd come in. He quickly checked the corridor and led the way out, Sam bringing up the rear. They made it a few dozen yards when Sam felt a strange feeling creep up her spine.

Jolinar abruptly reasserted herself, spinning Sam and bringing up her left hand, the newly acquired ribbon device flaring into life.

"Stop!" Amaunet ordered, striding down the narrow corridor. Without a word, Jolinar fired off a blast from her ribbon device, sending the goa'uld crashing into the wall.

"Carter! What the hell are you doing?" Jack demanded. Jolinar ignored him, hurrying to Amaunet's side. The goa'uld was struggling to get up. Jolinar held her down with one hand, activating the device again, this time sending a paralyzing beam into the woman's brain. She slumped onto the floor as Jolinar heard Jack step up behind her.

"What are you doing?" he demanded coldly.

Jolinar lowered her arm, reaching down to pull a non-resisting Amaunet to her feet. "Finishing something that was started over a year ago," she said. "She'll only stay tranquilized for an hour or so," Jolinar said. "Her presence should prevent any Jaffa at the gate from firing upon us."

Jack shook his head and growled softly in exasperation. "We're going to have a nice long talk when we get back," he promised. "Let's go," he ordered the rest of the group. They started back towards the dungeon, Jack hoping all along that there were no more surprises in store for them.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Doc? How's he doing?" Jack asked, leading Sam, Teal'c and Hammond into the infirmary. Daniel and Shau'ri had been borne off immediately upon arrival and, not surprisingly, the general had insisted upon an immediate briefing. They'd made it back to the gate and Earth meeting only a token resistance. Jack figured that either Jolinar's intelligence had been wrong, or they'd just been lucky.

"Eventually, he'll be fine," the doctor reported, looking down at the chart in her hands. Daniel was lying on the far bed, unconscious and now dressed in a hospital gown. The IV going into the back of his left hand and a garish burn on his forehead was the only indications that he wasn't just snagging a nap.

"Eventually?"

"The weapon caused inflammation of the brain. There's a minor bit of swelling, which accounts for the pain it causes, along with his unconscious state. However the MRI and PET scan both show that there's minimal damage. He was hurt worse when he flew through the gate a few months ago," she reassured them. "Right now he's sedated simply to alleviate the pain. Barring any complications, when he wakes up all he should have is the mother of all hangovers."

"What about Shau'ri?" Teal'c asked.

Janet made a face. "She's a different problem. As soon as she recovered from whatever Captain Carter did to her, the symbiote reasserted total control. It's threatening to kill the host if we don't let them go."

"There's a big surprise," Jack quipped.

"Is there any way to get the goa'uld out of her?" Hammond asked.

Janet shook her head, openly reluctant. "Given the situation with Major Kawalsky, I'm afraid to try. Amaunet has total control of the host, she can kill her in minutes, long before we can perform the extraction procedure."

"There is another way," Jolinar said, Sam's eyes flaring, an act that openly startled Janet. "The Tok'ra know of a paralytic agent that renders the symbiote harmless long enough to kill it."

"Kill it? You don't remove it?"

"Removal is possible, however not here with your limited medical facilities."

"What do you need?" Hammond asked.

"The Tok'ra use a combination of the paralytic agent and a device that removes the myriad of tendrils the symbiote weaves into the host's brain to control it. Without that device, removal of the symbiote will most likely kill the host."

"Do you know of the location of the device?" Teal'c asked.

"The Tok'ra have the only one," Jolinar said. "As you can imagine, knowledge of such a device is not something we advertise."

"Color me suspicious, but I find it a little coincidental that the one thing we want just happens to be on a planet full of folks that just might not like us much," Jack said.

"You believe that I am lying to you? That there is no such device and this is simply a plot to guarantee my return to my people?" Jolinar asked.

Jack shrugged and made a face. "The thought has crossed my mind."

"If Samantha told you of such a device and offered nothing more than her word, would you go?"

"You're not Carter," he insisted.

Sam blinked and dipped her head. "Colonel. She's telling you the truth. It's not a trap. She promises you safe passage. We'll go, get this device and come back," she said.

"Colonel?" Hammond asked.

Clearly torn, Jack looked to Teal'c. "I believe Jolinar is telling us the truth," the Jaffa said.

Jack looked appraisingly at Sam. "You have my word, sir. She's not trying to trick you."

Jack sighed. "Sir, permission to…go meet these Tok'ra," he said.

"Granted. Colonel. You can leave when ready," the general said.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam walked through the gate, a sense of familiarity washing over her as she took in the amber sands of the current Tok'ra base. She felt a sense of contentment and almost giddy happiness fill Jolinar, and by extension, her. 'So this is where you live?' she asked her symbiote, intensely curious. Although they'd been together for months, she'd never inquired into the symbiote's past.

'This is our current base. I have no home world.'

"O'Neill!" She turned to see Teal'c standing over a blackened area, something she had missed in her first curious observance of the world. She walked over to him and stared in horror at the blackened corpse of a Jaffa, half buried in the sand. "He has not been dead more than a day."

'No,' Jolinar begged, her feeling of dread spreading to Sam. 'The rings.' The symbiote took control of Sam's body, running through the heavy sand that dragged at her feet.

"Carter!" she heard Jack yell.

Ignoring him, they surged forward, struggling up a large dune. Reaching the top, she fell to her knees, barely able to comprehend what she was seeing. Instead of soft, rolling dunes, there was only a deep pit, occasionally marred by black scars of weapons fire.

"Damn it, Carter," Jack cursed behind her. "Or whoever the hell is driving. What are you doing running off…oh." He came to a stop at her side, seeing what she saw. "This doesn't look good."

"They have left," Teal'c stated.

"What?"

"The Tok'ra house their bases in tunnels which they collapse when they abandon a planet. Apophis once set me to find these tunnels. I never did. He killed many of my men in punishment," the Jaffa stated.

A small movement caught Sam's eye and she stared, ignoring the conversation of the two men behind her. Struggling to her feet she threw herself down the dune, at times more rolling than walking down the sandy slope. Reaching the figure she again threw herself to her knees, digging frantically at the sand covering him. He was dressed in the familiar garb of the Tok'ra, his light colored clothing obviously saving him from detection by the Jaffa that had attacked the base. Rolling him over she let out a small cry as she recognized his blood-smeared face. "Martouf." She reached out a shaking hand and brushed his curly hair off his forehead. His eyes fluttered open and he gasped. "It's me, it's Jolinar." He didn't answer and she wondered if he understood her. "You hang on. I…we can take you somewhere safe."

A dark shape impinged itself on her vision and she looked up, smiling her thanks as she accepted the canteen proffered by Jack. Supporting the injured man she held it to his mouth, dribbling a little water in. "R…Rosha?"

Sam shook her head. "What happened?"

"Spy," he whispered. "Couldn't get…away."

"It'll be ok. We'll take you back to their planet. You'll be ok," she promised, not seeing the solemn shaking of Teal'c's head.

"Love…you," he whispered, his voice catching.

"Martouf?" Sam called, shaking the man slightly. "No. No." He took one last gasping breath and his eyes flared weakly, then went horribly limp, his head lolling on her arm. "Martouf! Martouf!" she screamed. Overwhelmed by grief, she could only sit in the sand and rock her mate, oblivious to everything around her.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Teal'c stepped into the cold room, steeling himself against the expected rejection. When the figure sitting by the shrouded table didn't move, he slowly stepped forward. He still fought with his disbelief at having his teammate back. He'd been pleasantly surprised to return to the SGC to discover that she'd come back to them. That surprise had been horribly tempered when Doctor Fraiser had informed him about Captain Carter's treatment over the last several months.

He was disappointed that one aspect of the Tau'ri was no better than the goa'uld they professed to hate. He knew the goa'uld would not hesitate to experiment on or even torture someone for information or knowledge and it seemed the Tau'ri were no better.

"Captain Carter," he said softly, coming to stand at her side. She was still in the fatigues she'd worn on the planet. One hand rested in her lap, the other was fondling Martouf's hair, repeatedly wrapping one curly lock around her finger. Mercifully, Doctor Fraiser or one of her nurses had washed the body, no trace of blood and dirt remained although he knew the sheet was not only shrouding the body, but the grievous wounds that had been fatal for the Tok'ra. "Jolinar?" he asked, hoping to garner a response from the symbiote.

"They were together for so long," she whispered. "Centuries and centuries, even in new hosts they managed to love each other." She turned to look at him, her eyes red and her face pale. "He was why she lived, why she kept us alive. Her life, my life didn't matter, it was all about him. He was everything to her." She stopped playing with his hair and laid her palm against his still cheek. "I've never felt that about anyone. I don't think I ever will."

"Captain Carter…Samantha…"

"Lantash was so different from Martouf, he was brasher, more confident. Martouf was so shy. That's what made him such a good operative. He could slip into the background, be totally unnoticed. Until he smiled. Everyone would notice his smile."

Her right hand shifted in her lap and he looked down, feeling his heart lurch as he caught sight of the metallic black shape of a pistol.

"Go away, Teal'c," she said, her voice flat.

"You do not want to do this," he said, watching as her fingers tightened around the grip.

"You don't know what I want, you don't know me. None of you know me. None of you have ever given a damn."

"That is not true. We care about you greatly."

"Then why the hell didn't you come?" she demanded, getting to her feet, the pistol still in her grasp. "It was easier that way, wasn't it? No more worrying about the 'girl', no more questions. It'll be just the guys, which is how you've always wanted it. I wasn't supposed to come back, was I? I'll just disappear. A couple of forms filled out in triplicate and it'll all be over."

"That is not true. And you know it. You have much left to live for."

She shook her head. "My career is over, my family thinks I'm dead, and I can't tell them where I've been. The colonel looks at me like…like the enemy. You…you distrust everything I say, so does the general. SF's follow me everywhere I go. I'm not welcome here, but I can't leave the base. I…we thought we'd be safe with the Tok'ra but they're gone and I have no idea where to find them. And the one person in the universe who I cared about is dead. A death I might have been able to prevent had they just let me go."

Teal'c listened and realized that the thoughts of the host and symbiote were blending, the despair of one was overwhelming the other.

"No one wants me here, but no one wants to let me leave. This is the best way." She brought the gun up with a trembling hand. "At least the scientists at Area 51 will be happy. They wanted to take a look at my brain."

He watched in horror as her finger tightened on the trigger. Praying he could move fast enough, he lurched forward, grabbing her hand and wrapping his fingers around the gun. He fought her new strength, pushing the muzzle up as she fired, the explosion echoing horribly through the small room.

Wrenching the pistol from her grasp he watched the emotions play across her face before she crumpled, tears streaming down her cheeks. Gently sliding the pistol across the room, he knelt down, pulling her trembling figure into his arms and rocking her gently as she cried.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam tensed for a moment, then allowed herself to relax into his embrace. So long, it had been so long since anyone had touched her with anything more than clinical coldness. He was a warm solid presence and she felt safe and protected for the first time in months. He crooned to her in his native tongue, and for the first time she understood the words, the translation courtesy of Jolinar.

The symbiote had withdrawn, isolating herself, and more importantly her emotions, from her host. Sam had never realized how much the Tok'ra was counting on returning to her home. That had been her plan all along, once she had realized that Sam wasn't a willing host, to go home and find a new one. She was now the one thing she'd spent her entire existence fighting against, a symbiote in an unwilling host. The Tok'ra's self disgust was al almost physical force. The death of her mate being the final event to push her to the breaking point.

"What am I gonna do, Teal'c," Sam asked, remaining in his arms.

"Captain Carter?"

"We've got nowhere to go. Jolinar has no idea where any of the Tok'ra may be, if any of them are still alive, and I doubt General Hammond will let us just go through the gate. Even best case scenario, if we stay here and avoid the NID, I'll have to live here on base, there's no way they'll ever trust me to live in the real world."

"You could perhaps seek refuge on another planet."

She shook her head. "Nasyia was attacked because a goa'uld was looking for me…Jolinar. The same could be true of any other planet we hide on. She can't, I can't let that happen. It's bad enough that Cronos might find out that I'm here." She closed her eyes and listened to his heart, beating against her ear. The regular, low rhythm reassured her and she felt her own heart fall into beat with his.

"I remember hearing many rumors of wide spread Tok'ra infiltration. That often operatives are undercover for many months to years."

Sam nodded. "Yeah."

"Then it is very likely that there are many Tok'ra among the ranks of various system lords. Tok'ra whose paths we may very well cross in the future."

"She hadn't thought of that," Sam said, pulling back a bit.

"It is also possible that Amaunet has knowledge of Tok'ra operatives," he said. "Knowledge she may be persuaded to share."

"Oh my God. It'll happen to her, won't it?" she asked, horrified.

"Captain Carter?"

"The NID. They'll come and get her and the same thing that happened to us will happen to her."

"That is likely. However I can see no other possible outcome since the symbiote could not be removed."

She struggled to her feet, wiping her face off on her sleeve. "I need to talk to Janet."

Teal'c also got up, shooting her a concerned look. "Captain Carter."

"The machine we were looking for was just the safest way. There's another, it's…riskier, a lot riskier, but if it works, we can kill Amaunet and leave Shau'ri alive." She turned to

leave, then looked back. "Teal'c, can I ask you a favor?"

"Of course."

"I want to take Martouf home. After…this, will you go with me?"

"I would be honored," he said sincerely.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"You want to do what?" Daniel asked, his voice incredulous.

"There's a poison, it's similar to curare here on Earth. It will kill the symbiote, eventually," Sam said, ignoring Jack and Janet's skeptical looks.

"Why didn't you mention this before?" Hammond asked.

"This way is a lot riskier than the machine we were looking for," Sam said.

"How much riskier?" Janet asked.

Sam closed her eyes and Jolinar came forward. "A symbiote is capable of releasing a fast acting poison into the host's body. This is done as a defensive measure. Even if a symbiote leaves voluntarily, some of its memories remain in the host. The goa'uld see this as a threat. Therefore it is their practice to insure that the host, and the secrets it carries, perishes."

Daniel frowned, then winced as the movement pulled on the burn on his forehead. He'd woken up a few hours ago, while they'd been on the Tok'ra planet and was sitting up in the bed. From the pinched look on his face, his head had to still be hurting him.

"But if it works like curare, won't it paralyze the symbiote before it can release the poison?" Janet asked.

"It all depends upon how desperate the symbiote is. Releasing the poison is a conscious decision, one some symbiotes take faster than others," Jolinar said. "If we can catch the symbiote unaware, it is possible that it will not be able to release the poison before it dies."

"And if it does?" Jack asked.

"Then things depend upon how much poison is released, and how strong the host is," Jolinar explained. "Some are able to fight it off, other succumb. Doctor Jackson, even if she survives, the death of a symbiote can be very traumatic. For more than a year, Shau'ri has been a prisoner in her own body. Her immune system has been suppressed and altered to accept the alien body of Amaunet. If she survives physically, she may not mentally."

"Daniel Jackson, the future of Shau'ri is not a good one if Captain Carter's experience is indicative of the NID's behavior," Teal'c said.

Daniel laid back against the pillows, running his fingers through his hair. "You said you were of the Tok'ra?" he asked Jolinar.

"Yes."

"Tok…Ra…against Ra. You're resistance," he prodded.

"Yes. We have been fighting the ways of the system lords for millennia."

"Then, wouldn't the death of one more goa'uld be a good thing," he countered.

"Daniel, it was her idea to bring Shau'ri back. She could have killed her on the planet," Jack said.

"Can't interrogate her if you kill her," Daniel said petulantly.

"Doctor Jackson, I have fought the goa'uld for many hundred years. It is very doubtful that Shau'ri possesses any knowledge of value to the Tok'ra. My motivation for helping remove Amaunet from Shau'ri stems solely from Samantha who not only wishes to help her, but also wishes to do what she can to prevent Shau'ri from falling into the hands of the NID," Jolinar said.

"If removing a symbiote is possible, why haven't we heard about it before?"

"If the survival of your race depended upon hosts, would you make knowledge of how to remove them easy to attain?" Teal'c said.

Sam nodded her head, signaling that Jolinar was retreating. "Look, Daniel. It's your choice. She is telling the truth."

"What's to stop us from doing the same thing to her? We could make this poison and test it on you," Daniel said, ignoring Jack's frown and Teal'c's glowering look.

Sam cocked her head and frowned. "If that's what it takes," she said. "But you should know, right now Jolinar really doesn't care if she lives or dies, only if I do. And I promise you, Amaunet does not feel the same way about Shau'ri. I'll be in my quarters if you decide. General," she acknowledged, then walked from the room.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Now what?" Jack asked, staring at the two people at the far side of the infirmary. Shau'ri was lying in the bed while Daniel sat at her side, holding her hand and speaking to her in a low voice. It had taken him just a couple of hours to agree to the procedure, and only then after Janet and Teal'c had convinced him that Thor's Hammer was a far more traumatic method of extraction. And far more dangerous given that the exit to the labyrinth was several miles from the gate and the advanced medical facilities of the SGC.

"Now we wait," Janet said.

"What about the aah…" Jack made vague gestures towards the back of his neck.

"Shau'ri's body will simply absorb the symbiote."

"Absorb it?" Jack asked incredulously.

"Believe it or not, sir. That's actually safer than surgery, especially given her mental and physical state. And since the symbiote has subverted her immune system, there should be no problems."

Jack shuddered. "It's just…creepy."

Janet looked at her watch and frowned. "Aren't you going to be late, sir?"

"Late for what?"

"Martouf's funeral," she reminded.

"There's a funeral?"

"Yeah. Sam and Teal'c got permission to take him home and bury him there. I thought you knew?"

Jack frowned. "No. I didn't. If you'll excuse me, doc?"

He left the infirmary and quickly made his way to the control room. Carter and Teal'c were working with the techs to secure the stokes basket containing Martouf's body bag onto the FRED. Both of them were dressed in fatigues and apparently ready to go.

Torn between two choices, he watched them for a few minutes. He could just pretend that he got here too late and that he'd missed them. They obviously had Hammond's permission, and the old man hadn't thought that Jack needed to be informed. Or maybe he had been and it was one of those danged memos cluttering his inbox.

Maybe Hammond had charged Teal'c with chaperoning Jolinar, or maybe he didn't care anymore. Maybe she'd finally earned his trust.

Or maybe he should go down there and offer to go along. It was sort of his duty as Carter's CO. and no one should have to bury their mate, husband, essentially alone. Moral support. He could do that.

"Sargent?" he said to Davis.

"Sir?"

"They do not leave until I get back. That's an order."

"Yes, sir."

Satisfied, Jack turned and left the room, hurrying towards his locker.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam looked up from the remote and glanced at her companions. Teal'c and Colonel O'Neill were both walking on the other side of the FRED, talking quietly to each other. She'd been honestly surprised when the colonel had caught up with them in the control room, announcing his intention to go along with them to Mathia, Martouf's home planet. He'd acted a bit odd, like his feelings were hurt that he hadn't been invited. Which seemed strange to her, given how he'd acted in the last few days.

She knew the colonel had little patience for ceremony, and would have even less for a funeral for a person he'd never met, who had the added stigma of being a host.

"How much further?" Jack asked.

"Martouf's village is just through those trees," Sam said, drawing the knowledge from Jolinar. Ever since her breakdown of the previous day, the Tok'ra had kept mainly to herself, occasionally feeding Sam information but not asserting control or engaging in any conversation, the only exception being her conversation with Daniel.

Sam could sense that the symbiote had scared herself, not realizing at the time how close she'd pushed her host to suicide. And that she was purposefully keeping her distance, not wanting to make the same mistake again.

"What kind of a ceremony are we talking about here?" Jack asked.

"It's a cremation, sir. The Tok'ra don't believe in burial, especially given the existence of sarcophagi. The body of both host and symbiote must be totally destroyed. Some people use the energy vortex from the stargate to destroy the bodies. Martouf's people believed in cremation. If it's still standing, they have a ceremonial pyre already built, we'll just need to get some wood."

"If it's still standing?" Jack asked as they cleared the trees. "Oh," he said, coming to a stop.

"The goa'uld Nirti raided this planet nearly fifty years ago," Teal'c said, his face grim at the sight of destroyed homes and abandoned debris. If any of the homes had survived intact, they were not among the ones he could see. Most of them were simply partial walls or tumbled piles of stones, tufts of opportunistic grass and weeds doing their best to reclaim the land. Too many times in his life he had seen this scene. Usually in his memories, the fires still burned and the wounded still begged for water or mercy. "Those that survived, fled through the stargate to another world."

"Or in the case of Martouf, offered to become a host to Lantash," Sam said, moving the FRED forward. "The pyre should be on the other side of town. We can get there, then break for lunch, if that's ok with you, sir?"

"Yeah, whatever," Jack answered, his eyes darting about.

It took them about fifteen minutes to navigate their way through the ghost town and find the pyre. Ironically, the black stained cairn of rocks had survived the bombardment intact. They ate a perfunctory lunch, Sam and Jack set to gathering as much deadfall wood as they could find, while Teal'c used some of the smaller branches to make a rack to place the body upon. The stone pyre was made in such a way to amplify the heat generated by a fire, hopefully making the process as quick as possible. Sam had planned ahead and received permission to bring along some incendiary devices to help make the fire burn hotter.

In a couple of hours, their work was complete and Sam stood back as Jack and Teal'c placed the shrouded body on the pyre. She lit a torch, feeling Jolinar coming forward a bit, although the Tok'ra was still striving to keep her feelings controlled. 'You do it,' Sam encouraged the alien.

'What?'

'He's your husband. You should light the fire.'

'I…'

'I'm not afraid. Jolinar, please. If you don't do this, you're going to regret it,' Sam said.

The Tok'ra reluctantly came forward, controlling Sam although she had her feelings under an iron grip. "Tell ma veriunte schree. Tell ma. Tak mal arik tiak," she said, lowering the torch to the piled kindling. She stood there, feeling the heat build until the first flames started to lick at the white sheet shrouding the body. Then she relinquish control and Sam stepped back, feeling more than seeing O'Neill and Teal'c step forward to stand at her side.

"I regret that I never had the opportunity to know Martouf and Lantash," Teal'c said.

"I think you would have liked him," Sam said. "Martouf anyway."

"What was wrong with Lantash?" Jack asked.

"Lantash was…he could be a bit of an asshole at times. Brusque, opinionated, short tempered. But at the heart of it all, he was totally devoted to stopping the goa'uld."

"Sounds like an interesting guy," Jack answered.

"He was, sir. He was."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack sat on a large log and cast an appraising look at the fire. It had burned down now into the hollow confines of the cairn. He could feel the intense heat radiating against his face and knew that it'd likely burn for hours. Hours that they technically didn't have. The sun was now lowering on the horizon and he figured that they'd have just about enough time to make it to the gate and home before it was totally dark.

"Teal'c?" he asked the Jaffa meditating a few feet away. "We got to get going. Where'd Carter go?"

"Captain Carter expressed an interest in exploring the remains of the village."

Jack got to his feet and walked towards the FRED. The cargo area of the large machine was still loaded with a few boxes, none of which they'd touched for the funeral. At first he'd thought they'd served a ceremonial purpose or something, but obviously not. Bored, he opened one of the boxes, frowning at the sight of a large quantity of MRE's. This was too much food, even if they'd been planning to stay until the fire was out, they wouldn't need this much, he thought, flipping through and counting the plastic sealed packets.

Following his intuition, he opened the other boxes, not surprised to find more food, some medical supplies and other trappings of a camp. Whoever had done the packing had planned for more than a simple funeral.

"Teal'c?" he called. "What's with all the supplies?"

"Perhaps you should ask Captain Carter," Teal'c replied evasively.

"I'm asking you."

"I can not tell you, O'Neill."

"Teal'c. I am ordering you to tell me what the hell's going on," Jack said, his voice rising.

"He can't, sir. Because if he did that, he'd break his promise," Sam said, coming up behind Jack.

"Carter, what the hell are you doing dragging along this many supplies. You know how long it's gonna take us to put them away when we get back?"

"I'm not going back, sir," she said.

'What?'

"Excuse me?" Out of the corner of his eye, Jack saw Teal'c get to his feet. "What half baked plot did the two of you cook up?" he asked, stepping back a bit so he could keep an eye on both of them.

'What he said.'

"One that was a lot easier before your conscience got the better of you," she muttered.

"You were not supposed to accompany us, O'Neill," Teal'c said.

"You're gonna run away, aren't you?" Jack asked. "Both of you?"

"No," Sam answered. "Just me…us. Colonel, we both know that I don't belong on Earth any more. And there's no way for the SGC to just let me go, not without getting into tons of trouble. I'm too valuable," she spit the word.

'Samantha, what are you doing?' Jolinar asked. 'Earth is your home.'

"However, should Captain Carter and Jolinar betray our trust and escape, the reputation of the SGC would be largely untainted."

"So what? You expect people to believe that Carter overpowered you, Teal'c, and then escaped to parts unknown?" Jack asked.

"Under normal circumstances, a human female, even one of Captain Carter's skill, would not be able to overpower me very easily, however a human blended with a goa'uld would have certain advantages."

"Where are you going to go?" Jack asked, trying a different tact.

"There have to be more of the Tok'ra out there. At any given time, dozens of operatives are on missions. And they'll know how to contact the others. All we have to do is find them."

'You don't know that. They could have been betrayed. There may be none left.'

"So, you're just gonna gatehop, flit from goa'uld base to goa'uld base looking for the one that has the super secret Tok'ra password," Jack said derisively.

"It's for the best, sir. Me going back to Earth puts you and General Hammond into an untenable position. If I escape, you don't have the security risk of a goa'uld on the base, and you don't have the NID's most wanted hiding out in the mountain either. It's the best for everyone," she said.

'Except for you.'

"How about for you?"

"We'll be fine."

'We will?'

"Really? You made some mention once that Jolinar was going to find a new host when she could and leave you."

"That's right."

"So where does that leave YOU?" he asked pointedly. "You can't come home."

'He's right. Your iris will prevent you from ever coming home. They will see this as the ultimate betrayal. You can't do this.'

"There's plenty of friendly planets out there. I'm sure one of them won't mind taking me in," she said.

"What about your family? Have you thought about what this will do to them?"

'I didn't know you had a family.'

"Tell me the truth, sir. Has my brother or my dad come looking for me? No. They haven't. That's because we're not what you'd call close. I think General Hammond talks to my dad more than I do. I've been gone for six months, I'll be declared MIA, the Air Force will cook up some story and eventually they'll declare me dead. A nice memorial service with an empty casket. End of story."

"And the supplies?"

"Those were my idea, O'Neill. Captain Carter believed she could forage, I had a more realistic picture of the devastation of this planet."

"She's not just coercing you into helping her, you're actually conspiring with her?"

"I conspired with Captain Carter and Jolinar as a reparation for my failures in the past. Had I…we been more vigilant, she would never have fallen into the custody of the NID, or come to their notice. Her present condition is largely our fault, and it falls to us to remedy it."

"That's not true, Teal'c," she protested.

'No. It's not their fault. It's mine,' Jolinar said sadly. 'If I had just had the courage to die.'

'Jolinar, stop. What's done is done,' Sam said.

Jack looked at the two defiant figures before him and sighed. Teal'c had hit the nail squarely on the head. It was their fault that Carter and Jolinar had gone through all they had. They knew how the NID lusted after anything goa'uld or Jaffa. And they should have known that word of Carter's condition would get out, especially after how Hammond had taken such enjoyment in rubbing Kennedy's face in not being given custody of Teal'c. Not to mention their little scam to let the Tollans go home.

Between them, his team and his CO had thumbed their noses at the NID for the better part of a year. It made sense that they'd love nothing more than to get their hands on a goa'uld, and the fact that that goa'uld was a member of SG-1 had to be the icing on the cake. They'd made one hell of a messy bed, and Carter had had to pay the price. "Come home," he said abruptly.

"Sir, I can't."

"Come home, let Hammond and I see what we can do. If we can't work things out to your satisfaction, we'll help you find these Tok'ra."

"Colonel…"

"Carter. Tell me it wouldn't be a hell of a lot easier to look for these spies of yours if you had some idea where to look. We can go back to the planet, see if they left a forwarding address or something. We'll help you look," he said, looking her in the eyes. He saw the indecision on her face, her desire to stay home warring with her common sense and her fear of the NID. "I promise you. If the NID try to get their hands on you, I'll dial the gate myself and get you somewhere safe." She looked away, still unsure. He stepped forward; taking her shoulders in his hands and making her look him in the eyes. "You have my word, if they get their hands on you again, it'll be over my dead body."

'Listen to him,' Jolinar urged. 'Let them help you.'

She closed her eyes and he felt her shoulders slump. "Ok. We'll go back," she said softly.

Jack squeezed her shoulders reassuringly. "Sweet. If you're done here, we need to go. We got a long walk."

They quickly gathered up their gear and started following the FRED to the gate, using the headlights on the rover to light their way. "I am curious," Jack said after a few minutes. "How did you two get all these supplies?"

"Oh," Sam said, shooting him a sheepish look.

"Carter?"

"We aah…we forged your signature."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam sat in her lab, studying some of the devices that had piled up during her absence. Rationally, she knew there was nothing incredibly spectacular or dangerous among the artifacts. Without her around to study them, she was sure the really interesting things were already at Nellis. And if the two SF's outside her door were any indication, she doubted the general would trust her with anything too explosive, especially after their little trick with the FRED the other day. Not that he didn't understand, but she did see a bit of hurt in the old man's eyes when he realized that she and Teal'c had sort of lied to him, abusing his generosity in allowing the funeral as a chance for her and Jolinar to escape.

It was a little annoying to be followed everywhere she went, but it was far better than spending endless days in the VIP room she'd been assigned staring at the ceiling. And it felt good to tinker, to wrap her mind around a puzzle and not let go until she solved it.

'Lunch time,' Jolinar prodded.

'Huh?'

'Lunch. Food. Nourishment.'

'We had a donut a couple of hours ago,' Sam said, frowning as she tried to pry the outer casing off an alien device.

'So?'

'So, I'm not hungry.'

'Yes, you are.' On cue, Sam's stomach rumbled.

'Stop that.'

'You do realize that for as long as we are blended, your aging is slowed. You could have up to fifteen centuries to tinker.'

'Well, the way I'm going, it'll take that long.'

'Do you also realize that I can speed up your metabolism so you could consume vast quantities of food and never gain weight.'

'Jol, what's behind this sudden desire to eat?'

'?'

'Don't give me the innocent act. What is in the commissary that you're so eager to get to?'

'They ran out yesterday.'

'Ran out of what?'

'Jello.'

'What?'

'That's what you call it, right. Jello. I especially like the blue kind.'

Sam was ready to chide her symbiote when the phone rang, startling her. It was nearly two weeks since she'd returned to the SGC and still the NID hadn't come. Despite the colonel's promise, she still couldn't shake that anxious feeling that plagued her almost constantly. She hadn't ventured up to the surface or made any attempt at contacting anyone, fearing the nightmare scenario of them getting pulled into this whole mess. "Carter," she said, picking up the receiver.

"There you are," Jack said. "Come down to the infirmary."

"Sir?"

"Don't waste time arguing with me, just get down here," he ordered.

"Yes, sir," she said, shrugging a bit.

'What is that all about?'

'I dunno. Let's get Heckle and Jeckle and find out." Sam stepped out into the hall, smiling as the two SF's fell into step behind her. If she were being really ornery she'd break into a run and leave them behind. But the last thing she needed was to make Hammond any madder at her than he already was. She did however, take the stairs down the three levels to the infirmary.

"Colonel?" she asked, stepping into the room. Teal'c, Janet and O'Neill were all gathered right inside the door to the infirmary.

"Ssh," Jack urged, putting his fingers over his lips. "Don't spook her," he whispered, pointing off to the last bed. Daniel was sitting beside the bed, as had been his norm for the last several days. This time, however, instead of Shau'ri lying, non-responsive, in the bed, she was sitting up, an infant cradled in her arms.

"That's great," Sam said, happy that Shau'ri appeared to be recovering from the severe depression that had followed Amaunet's death. "How did you know she'd respond to a baby?"

"Mothers normally respond to their own infants," Janet said. "It was all the Colonel's idea, actually. He and Teal'c went to Abydos to find the child yesterday."

'What?' Jolinar asked, startling Sam a bit with the vehemence of her interest.

"I think I still got sand in my shorts," Jack groused.

"For one untrained in the martial arts, Kasuf is most adept at remaining concealed," Teal'c complimented.

"That's Apophis' child?" Sam asked, trying not to let Jolinar's intense interest show on her face.

Jack shrugged. "I've done the math, it can't be Daniel's," he said grimly, disgust on his face at the implications.

"Maybe we should give them some privacy," Janet suggested, deliberately turning away as Daniel stood up to help Shau'ri untie her gown, pulling it down so she could feed the child.

'What's wrong?' Sam asked Jolinar as they regrouped out in the hallway.

'Nothing.'

'It didn't feel like nothing. You definitely acted like it was something.'

'Later. I could be wrong, and I don't want to be wrong about this.'

"So, Carter, you two getting along ok?" Jack asked, breaking up Sam's and Jolinar's conversation.

"Sir?"

"You and…" He gestured towards the back of his neck. "No more temper tantrums or fights."

"We're fine, sir."

"Good," he said, clapping his hands together. "Then we gotta get downstairs." He started to walk away. "Come on."

"Colonel?"

"You'll find out when you get there," Jack said cryptically. "Let's go."

With a small shrug, she followed him, Teal'c walking at her side. They took the elevators this time, riding in silence down to Level 28. Still not satisfying her curiosity, Jack led her to Hammond's office, stepping aside so she could proceed him into the room.

"Aah, there you are," Hammond said, looking up. "Please." He gestured towards the chairs.

'What's going on?' Jolinar asked.

'I wish I knew,' Sam replied, taking a seat.

"These just arrived via messenger," the general said, handing Sam a packet of paper. "In there you'll find official papers removing the charge of AWOL from your record and restoring you to full active duty. There is also a Presidential pardon for any actions taken by you or Jolinar during your escape. The President is also very interested in these Tok'ra and the prospect of making an alliance with them against the goa'uld. To that end, he has recognized Jolinar as an official representative of that group and accorded her diplomatic immunity."

"I don't understand."

"Carter, the NID was able to do what they did because technically this program and the work you do in it doesn't exist. Now they do," Jack explained. "You're 100 off limits to them."

"Captain, Colonel O'Neill has relayed your concerns to me about remaining on Earth. This removes those obstacles. I am aware that Jolinar wishes to continue her search for the rest of her people, and while I can not commit extra resources to the task, I can inform all SG teams to be on the look out for any signs of this resistance," Hammond said. "However, in light of what's happened, if you wish to leave, I will regretfully let you go," he said, his eyes suspiciously misty.

"There 's even a vacancy on a field team, if you want it," Jack said, sharing a significant look with Teal'c.

'Stay,' Jolinar urged.

'You've wanted nothing more than to get off this planet for the last six months. Now you want to stay?'

'I have changed my mind. I want to stay on Earth,' she insisted. 'And I want to stay here.'

'What about the rest of the Tok'ra?'

'We have survived for two thousand years. Word of the exploits of the Tau'ri has spread. It is a matter of time before the Tok'ra contact Earth. I shall be here when they do.'

'And what about the NID? You know as well as I do that there are folks out there that won't see it as an obstacle, but as a challenge. There are people out there that still want us.'

'I need to stay here,' Jolinar insisted.

"Ok. We'll stay," Sam said, smiling at her friends.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Three days later she walked out onto the balcony of her new apartment, cradling the glass of wine in one hand. It had taken a couple of days of looking to find an apartment complex with security to meet her standards, but fortunately she'd found one. The studio apartment was located on the top floor of a ten story high rise and sported a breathtaking view of the Rockies and Pikes Peak off to the west. It was expensive, but thanks to six months of back pay and a little negotiating by General Hammond, who just happened to be an old war buddy of the landlord, she was able to afford it.

So far, she'd furnished it very simply, acknowledging that she spent so much time on the base, she really didn't need much. And after spending six months either under a mountain, or locked in a room, she relished the wide-open and airy feeling of the place.

'Are you going to tell me why it was so important to stay here?' Sam asked, taking a sip of the mellow wine.

'I changed my mind.'

Sam snorted. 'Please. If you want this blending thing to work, you need to be honest with me. The colonel barely trusts me now, and I can't make him trust you if I don't.' She felt Jolinar waffle a bit, clearly reluctant to share. 'Jols.'

'There is a legend, among the goa'uld and the Tok'ra. It is called Harcesis.'

'What's that?'

'Goa'uld and Tok'ra are genetically the same species.'

'I know that. Same race, different politics.'

'The goa'uld possess a genetic memory. Each offspring bears the memories of the queen who spawned it, and the goa'uld whose genetic material is used in conception. This is how, once it had matured inside a Jaffa, a goa'uld is able to subvert a host and immediately begin his or her rise to power.'

'They're born bad?'

'Essentially.'

'What does this have to do with Hrabe? He's human, not a goa'uld.'

'When two goa'uld procreate, the offspring is said to contain the knowledge of ALL who has come before him. If Hrabe is a true Harcesis, then he has the knowledge of every symbiote and every host in Apophis' lineage.'

'Ok. That's not good. But he's just a baby.'

'Much of a goa'uld's energies goes into subverting the host. Even after they have surrendered, there is an inherent reluctance. If Hrabe is a Harcesis, he would not only be a willing host, he would be compelled to be a host. He not only has the knowledge of Apophis, but he will want to use that knowledge. He will be compelled to seek out and attain power,' the Tok'ra explained.

'And he has a few millennia of knowledge to help him do that,' Sam said, finally understanding.

'If the legend is true. And if he is indeed Harcesis,' Jolinar said.

'We should warn Daniel…'

'No.'

'Why not? If he's that dangerous…'

'Can you imagine what your NID would do with access to Hrabe's memories? He is safest if no one knows of his existence.'

The intercom buzzed, forestalling what was sure to be a long argument. 'We are not done with this,' she promised her symbiote, walking back into the apartment and pressing the button on the box. "Yes?"

"Yo Rapunzel, want to let me in?" Jack asked, his new nickname making Sam smile.

Pressing the button she set down her wine and hurried back to her bedroom, exchanging her pajamas for a more concealing pair of sweats. The colonel may have certainly seen her in less, but she still felt more comfortable not receiving guests in her sleepers.

She walked back out into her living room, just as the doorbell rang. She looked through the peephole, then opened the door. "Colonel, this is a surprise," she said, stepping back to let him in.

"Well I aah…little housewarming." He held out a chilled bottle of wine.

"Thank you," she said, accepting it. "Make yourself at home and I'll go open this." She walked into her small kitchen, digging in the drawer for her corkscrew. She poured two glasses and padded out into the living room, finding Jack on her balcony enjoying the view. Handing him a glass, she took a sip and leaned against the railing. "It's good," she said.

"I'm glad. I just went with what the clerk said. I'm not much of a connoisseur," he said. "You've got a great view."

She shrugged. "I may regret it this winter but…it is nice. It's fun to be up here, away from it all." She looked down at the sparse traffic. Her building wasn't downtown, but rather part of a new development on the northern fringes of the city. Which meant that traffic and noise were light, the area still a maze of construction zones.

They stood there for several minutes, watching as the sun turned the contrails from the jets coming and going from Petersen Air Force Base into ribbons of color in the darkening sky.

"You know, that field team position I was talking about, it's your old job," he spoke up, taking a sip of the wine.

"That's not necessary, sir." He raised his eyebrows in question and she sighed. "We can just work in the lab or help Daniel with his translations, assuming that he stays with the SGC now that he has Shau'ri back. Maybe Jolinar can help."

"You once told me that all you ever wanted to do was be on a field team."

"And you once said you'd never, ever trust a goa'uld," she countered.

"Carter."

"Sir. I know you don't trust me. And I understand. I don't know if I would trust me. It might be best for everyone's peace of mind if I stay on the base," she said, thinking about the secret she was now keeping from her friends.

"I'm not doing this because I feel sorry for you," he said. "Hammond has made it official. Our mission statement is to look for tech or allies, and the Tok'ra just might qualify as allies. I got you on my team, I've got an advantage."

"An advantage?"

"Teal'c tells me the Tok'ra aren't exactly easy to find. Having someone along who could recognize one, is a good thing." She shrugged and turned away, taking another sip of her wine in lieu of arguing further. "Carter." She turned back. "YOU I trust. I always have."

"What about Jolinar?"

"As far as I'm concerned this whole mess is totally her fault. If she wouldn't have forced her way into your head, none of this would have happened."

"Apophis would still be alive, Shau'ri would still be missing…"

"You wouldn't have spent six months in hell," he countered.

Unable to argue, she turned away again, feeling Jolinar's own guilt and agreement with his words. Rationally, Sam knew the alien had only been trying to survive, the same way a drowning person will panic and drown someone else in an effort to stay afloat. Jolinar hadn't even been thinking rationally when she'd blended with Sam. She'd been dying and frantically took the only option she had.

And he wasn't saying anything that Sam herself didn't agree with. Blending with her had been one of those defining moments and had set a whole series of events into play that were still unraveling. Vaguely she wondered if there were one of Daniel's alternate universes out there where events hadn't played out as they had here. Maybe somewhere in the universe there was a Sam Carter who didn't have an alien living in her head.

"I should go," Jack said abruptly, setting his glass of wine down on her small deck table. "Early briefing."

"Thank you for…" she held up the glass of wine.

He nodded and shoved his hands in his jacket pockets. "Oh." He drew out a small box. "I aah…I wanted to give you this." He held out the box.

Sam set down her wine and took it, opening it with a small frown. "Colonel?" she asked, staring at the medal in the satin lined box.

"That shoulda been yours to start with," he said, referring to his Air Medal that had arrived in the same messenger packet as her pardon.

"This is yours, sir. I can't…"

"The minute you agreed to come with us, knowing that it was either a suicide mission or the end of your career, that was the moment that I knew there was no one else I wanted watching my back. I want you on SG-1, and if Jolinar has to come along for the ride to make that happen, I can live with it," he said sincerely. She looked down, her fingers tracing the edges of the medal. Her throat filling with unaccustomed emotion, she settled for nodding. "Then you may not want to finish that wine. We have a mission briefing at 0800," he said, emphasizing the we.

She swallowed. "I'll be there," she said, relieved when her voice didn't waver too much.

"Good." He turned and walked towards the door. He opened it, then turned back. "And Carter?"

"Sir?"

"You ever forge my name on a requisition again, I'll kick your ass." He shut the door behind him, leaving her alone. Still holding the medal, she walked back out onto her balcony. The sun had set and the darkened sky was coming alive with brilliant stars. She should feel elated, happy that she had her old job back and that things were as back to normal as they could be. But she couldn't. She couldn't shake the feeling that keeping Jolinar's secret may end up costing her more than she was willing to pay.

Fin


	2. Too High a Price

A Price Too High

By

Denise

"Witness if you will, a ghost town," Jack said, casually strolling through the alien city.

"A very advanced ghost town," Sam replied, choking back a grin at the antics of her CO. God, she'd missed this.

'Planet hopping?' Jolinar asked.

'You never worked with a team, did you?' Sam asked her symbiote.

'No. The Tok'ra usually work in solitude or pairs.'

"The architecture may indicate an Earth ancestry," Daniel said.

'He's right,' Jolinar said.

'And what do you know of Earth ancestry?' Sam asked.

'Everything you do,' the Tok'ra quipped, her tone light and teasing. They'd been back on active duty for just a couple of weeks, this exploratory mission the first one for the newly reunited SG-1.

"Aw, man..." She heard Jack complain. Pulling her attention back to the external world, she fought laughter at the sight of her CO lifting his foot out of some substance. "Anybody have any idea what this is?" he asked.

"I hate to say it sir, but it...seems like they might have a bit of a pigeon problem."

'Pigeon?'

'A bird,' Sam explained.

'Oh. Feces,' Jolinar said. 'You should take an image.'

'What?'

'The officers at the SGC often say that he's full of it.'

"I don't see pigeons...and there should be a lot of them," Jack said, totally unaware of Sam's other conversation.

"Well, whatever did this, did so pretty recently," she said aloud. 'Stop it,' the chided her symbiote, fighting laughter at the images the creature was feeding her.

"Perhaps they suffered the same fate as the inhabitants of this city," Teal'c suggested.

"Conjecture, Captain?"

"My data is consistent with the probe, sir. No radiation, the air's almost 100 pollution free. The goa'uld go for more of a scorched earth philosophy, sir," Sam said, drawing upon Jolinar's memories. In the past few weeks since they'd made their decision to stay on Earth and with the SGC, the Tok'ra had been more and more forthcoming with her knowledge.

Teal'c had been the most accepting, often adding his knowledge and perspective to hers. The colonel still had his reservations; Sam could see it in his eyes. Because of this, Jolinar tended to keep a low profile around the man, often feeding Sam information and letting the human relay it. She acted the same way with Daniel. In fact, Teal'c was the only person in the SGC that Jolinar came out and openly conversed with. At times, Sam felt it was like the Tok'ra was trying to get everyone to forget that she even existed. Sam didn't know why her symbiote was behaving this way, and every time she'd tried to question her, the creature simply pled tiredness.

After a while, Sam stopped asking, being honest enough with herself to admit that it did make things easier if people forgot her unique status.

"That is correct. A Goa'uld attack would have resulted in much more damage. Any technology would have been destroyed."

A loud buzzing filled the air and Sam watched Jack duck. "Wow! Did you guys hear that?"

'Jols?'

'I don't recognize it.'

Sam stared in horror at the large insect that landed on Teal'c's back. She could feel the tension increase and knew the others saw it as well.

"Ohh..." She heard Jack say softly.

"What are you gonna do?"

He silently pulled his side arm, his eyes narrowing as he took careful aim. 'Surely he does not mean to shoot it,' Jolinar said.

'Do you have a better idea?' Sam asked.

Maybe sensing that its death was imminent, the creature struck, it's tail swinging forward with a speed that even Jolinar couldn't see. Teal'c cried out and fell forward, grasping a pole to keep from falling to the ground.

"Carter...novocaine," Jack ordered, abandoning his attempts to shoot the creature as it fled.

"Yes, sir." She hurried forward. 'Jolinar, what's wrong with him?' she asked, fighting down the panic at the pain in her friend's voice.

'I do not know. His symbiote should be helping him.'

"Uh...we'd better get outta here," she heard Daniel say.

"No, really?"

"No, really," he insisted, ignoring Jack's sarcasm.

'RUN!' Jolinar screamed.

'What?"

"God! Let's move! C'mon! Let's go!" Suddenly grateful for Jolinar's gift of strength, Sam pulled one of Teal'c's arms over her shoulders feeling Jack do the same on the other side. They ran for their very lives, hearing the ominous buzzing of the swarm of insects drawing closer and closer.

She watched Daniel skid to a halt by the DHD, his hand flying across the surface of the device. "The code, Carter," Jack ordered, shifting his weight to allow her to free her arm.

She yanked her sleeve up, impatiently waiting for the gate to open. The second the vortex stabilized her fingers flew over the keypad, trying to ignore the growing buzz at their backs. "Clear!" she yelled, pulling Teal'c's arm back over her shoulder. They ran up the small flight of stairs, following Daniel through the gate.

"Lock it up!" She heard Jack yell the second they set foot on the ramp.

"Medical team!" she yelled, as Teal'c's legs gave out and he fell forward. Again relying on Jolinar's strength, she tried to support him, easing his descent.

"What is that?" She heard Hammond demand as the iris spun shut, ominous thuds heralding the persistence of the creatures.

"Those are bugs, sir! Big...ugly bugs!" Jack said, breathing as heavily as her, both from their exertions and their close call.

'Are all your missions like this?' Jolinar asked plaintively as they moved to allow the medics to get to Teal'c.

'Some,' Sam admitted.

'Great,' the Tok'ra said. 'Just great.'

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"He seems to be suffering from the side effects of a viral infection...fever, aches, chills..." Janet reported, her face revealing to them the seriousness of the situation.

"And his Goa'uld isn't helping?" Sam asked.

"No...that's not the worse part..."

'It should be,' Jolinar said. 'A Jaffa's symbiote should protect it from most threats.'

'Well, it's not,' Sam said. 'Have you heard of this bug before?'

'No.'

"The blood sample I took showed a rather disturbing amount of DNA that doesn't match Teal'c's," Janet continued.

"What does that mean?" Both Jack and Daniel asked.

"Actually, I'm not sure...um, to be perfectly honest with you, sir, I think I may be out of my league here," Janet admitted, startling her. If the doctor was at a loss, they were in trouble.

"General, if I may...when I was assigned to the Pentagon, I had the chance to work with Dr. Timothy Harlow. He's one of the world's top geneticists and he has full security clearance," Sam suggested.

"He'll be here before the end of the day."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam walked down the halls, on her way to visit Teal'c. 'I wonder if Timothy's made any progress?'

'You did say he is the best,' Jolinar reminded.

'There just has to be a way to fix this. I mean, Junior's almost as good as you are.'

Jolinar sighed. 'Almost is the operative word. He is just an infant. And there is a vast difference between carrying a primta and being blended,' she reminded.

'I know, I know. I just…I don't want to lose him, not like this.' She heard footsteps echoing in the corridors and paused, the hair on the back of her neck standing up. She caught sight of a figure walking down an intersecting corridor, flanked by two SF's. 'No,' she said, her heart lurching. 'This can not be happening.' Panic overwhelmed her at the thought of having that man on the base.

'What's he doing here?" Jolinar asked, sharing Sam's alarm.

'I have a damned good idea,' Sam raged. 'I am going to kill the son of a bitch.' She turned and ran down the other way, abandoning the elevator for the stairs. He was not going to get her friend, she didn't care if she had to shoot him on the spot, he was not getting his hands on Teal'c.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Come in."

Jack walked into the office. "You wanted to see me, sir?" he asked the man, frowning slightly at the serious look on his face. The general remained silent, simply gesturing slightly with his head. "Oh, for cryin' out loud," Jack groaned, rolling his eyes at the sight of Harry Maybourne standing there.

"Colonel O'Neill."

"Hello, Maybourne," Jack said, his voice deliberately cold. He had balls showing up here, especially after what he'd done to Sam.

"I thought you would want to see this," George said, holding out some papers.

Jack took them, somehow knowing he wasn't going to like what he was going to read. He was right. "You've got to be kidding."

"It's an official order. I have no choice," the general said, shaking his head slightly.

"Well, uh...what about..."

"The president is currently unavailable."

"This facility is front-line. Your mandate is search and retrieval. Mine is research and development. As a source of information, Teal'c has been invaluable to your operation. Now he may prove equally invaluable to mine. This organism could be the biological weapon..."

"He saved your smarmy ass and everyone else on this planet. Does that count for anything in your world?"

"Absolutely. I am thrilled to get the chance to thank him personally."

"General Hammond, request permission to beat the crap out of this man."

"Denied, Colonel," the general said.

"Sir…" Jack protested, falling silent at the man's sharp look.

"Colonel Maybourne, I have to obey this…order, but it doesn't say here that I have to like it. Now get the hell out of my sight."

Maybourne turned, pausing to take the papers from Jack's hand, before he left the office. Jack watched him go, then shut the door behind him. "You think he bought it, sir?" Jack asked quietly.

George sighed. "I hope so. What about Captain Carter?"

"General?"

"Have you told her about our plans?"

Jack shook his head. "No, sir. I…I didn't want to get her hopes up."

George shrugged. "If you're not going to tell her, you may want to keep an eye on her. I have no idea if Jolinar feels the same way she does, but killing Maybourne is not in our best interests, not yet anyway."

"I will, sir," Jack said. He turned to leave the room, then turned back. "If this doesn't work, I really DO want to shoot him…sir."

"I just may let you," George muttered as the door closed.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"You son of a bitch!" Sam yelled, hurrying into the room. She took no little satisfaction from the startled look on Timothy's face. "You told them," she accused, ruthlessly tamping down on remembered fear. 'I should never have trusted him,' she told her symbiote.

'We had to do something to help Teal'c,' Jolinar said.

'You know what they'll do,' Sam reminded. 'The NID's been wanting to get their hands on Teal'c for over a year

"Sam?" he asked, his face irritatingly innocent.

'Maybe he didn't tell,' Jolinar suggested.

'He did,' Sam told her. "It had to be you. Damn it, Timothy, Teal'c is my friend. He's sick..."

"Yes, he is and he's going to get the very best help available...on this planet. But your facility is not equipped for this kind of situation and you know it."

'He is right. Your doctor can do nothing for him.'

'That's not the point. I trusted him. I thought he was different,' Sam said, feeling no little amount of disgust for herself. "Please, don't tell me that you're ignorant here. Do you have any idea what they'll do to him?" she asked, fighting the urge to have Jolinar make her eyes glow and her voice resonate. She wanted to scare the crap out of him, hell; she wanted to beat the crap out of him. "They don't give a damn about fixing him. All they see is a potential biological weapon. Teal'c is nothing to them. They'll use him, experiment on him then they'll just toss him aside," she said, her memory of the past ruthlessly filling in Teal'c's future.

"Maybourne's people can be unscrupulous, but if Teal'c is to have any chance, it is with me...and I will do the best that I can," he insisted.

Sam felt her anger build at his stupidity. He was never this blind, this idealistic. 'He honestly believes he can make a difference,' Jolinar said.

'He's an idiot,' Sam bit out. 'You can't fight them. There's no way to fight them. They always win,' Sam said, her heart sinking. 'Help me,' she begged.

'What?'

'He's my friend. He won't…I WON'T let him go through what we did. He'd rather die, and I'd rather he die. Help me,' she begged, ignoring the puzzled look on Timothy's face.

'Samantha…'

'Please.' She felt the symbiote agree and she turned, stalking from the room.

"Sam?" she heard Timothy call. "Are you ok?" She didn't bother to reply. He didn't matter any more.

Nothing mattered any more.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack leaned against the wall outside the infirmary, studying the remainder of his team. Both were uncharacteristically silent, their moods somber. He couldn't blame them. This sucked in so many ways. There was nothing they could do. Hammond had tried to call the president several times, only to fail each time. Jack wanted to hope that any second now the old man would come striding down the hall with a reprieve for Teal'c, but he acknowledged that it was unlikely. Whoever the hell was pulling Harry's strings, they had the right connections.

"General, I have a right to stop this. He is not well enough to be moved," he heard Fraiser protest. Nice try, doc, he thought knowing that she'd fail. Maybourne didn't give a damn about Teal'c's well being.

"Fortunately, I have a second opinion," Harry gloated. Jack felt his hands clench. He shoulda shot the SOB when he had the chance.

"How can we just let this happen?" Daniel asked.

"What do you want me to do?" Jack asked, shooting a glance at a silent Carter. She was taking this calmly. Too calmly. She hated Harry, he knew she hated him and all he represented, yet she'd been the most silent about the situation. He expected to have to hold her back. Instead she'd been so calm that it was spooking him. "Carter?" It was almost like she was in on their little secret. But she couldn't be. No one knew outside of their little circle of three.

"As much as I don't trust Maybourne, I have to admit...Timothy is the best and he gave me his word he was gonna help Teal'c," she said, not meeting his eyes. Jack frowned and looked at Daniel who shrugged slightly. He started to press her further, his words cut off by the door opening, revealing Maybourne and Harlow, trailed by two guards escorting Teal'c, in shackles. "What's with the chains?" Jack asked, feeling his anger well again.

"Maybourne," Hammond said, his expression revealing his disgust.

"Of course..." Jack watched his friend led away, his pain evident in his shuffling steps. This should not be happening. They'd just gotten back together, and now they were being torn apart. It wasn't right, it wasn't fair. Teal'c stumbled a bit and Jack watched one of the guards jerk him back upright. There was no compassion, no caring in the man's grip. In that moment he that if he stayed any longer, he'd do something he'd regret. Barely controlling his rage, he spun on his heel, stalking down the hall.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

'Are you sure about this?' Jolinar asked her host as they crouched in the bushes.

'I'm sure. They have to come this way.'

'That's not what I mean,' Jolinar said. 'Is this really the best way?'

'If they get him to Nevada, we'll never see him again. You know that.'

'Your friend Timothy…'

'Is a fool,' Sam said bitterly. 'You know what they'll do to him.'

'Yes,' Jolinar said, acknowledging that the Jaffa's fate in the hands of Maybourne would not be a good one. 'But is this the best way? Maybe your friends could help?'

'It's the only way,' Sam said, ignoring the Tok'ra's suggestion.

'Your friend was right. Doctor Fraiser has no idea how to help him.'

'Junior may still stop the disease,' Sam said.

'And if he doesn't?' Jolinar asked.

Sam sighed and closed her eyes. "He won't suffer," she whispered. "They're coming," she said, ending the conversation. She looked up, focusing on the white truck coming down the road towards them.

She armed and aimed her zat, grateful that they had brought some of the alien weapons back from Apophis' ship, and that she'd managed to liberate it from the base. She'd thought about shooting out the tires, but realized that Jolinar's idea of short-circuiting the vehicles electronics with a zat blast was not only quieter but also safer. Her finger tightened on the trigger.

'Wait,' Jolinar said, exerting a bit of control. 'Now!' She tightened Sam's finger on the trigger, firing the weapon. Blue light washed over the truck and it swerved, the driver struggling for control. It went off the road, ending up in the ditch. Sam hurried forward, quickly shooting the driver then making her way to the back of the truck. She flung open the doors, using Jolinar's faster reflexes to allow her to subdue the two guards and Timothy.

Teal'c was struggling to right himself, the manacles and yellow plastic suit hampering his efforts. Her eyes caught more movement and she raised her gun again, knowing who the last occupant was. She stepped forward, placing herself between Teal'c and the man. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" he asked. "You're violating a lawful order. I'll have your commission for this," he blustered, the severity of his threat lessened by the blood running down the side of his head and his arm that was hanging at an awkward angle.

Sam laughed, shocking both Harry and Jolinar. She stepped forward, raising her zat. "Is that supposed to scare me?" She reached out and grabbed his throat, squeezing it. "Am I supposed to be so intimidated at the thought of losing a meaningless title that I just let you go and help you torture my friend?" She shoved the zat into his face. "My God, you ARE an idiot. I would probably be doing the world a favor if I killed you." She squeezed her hand tighter, enjoying his struggles to breath

'Samantha?' She ignored her symbiote, her eyes narrowing as remembered fear and pain fueled her desire for revenge. 'You don't want to do this.'

_Voices filtering in through the pain. Clinical hands pushing aside and cutting away her clothes. _

_"How's long it been?"_

_"The subject was shot eight hours ago."_

_"The wound looks like it's a week old. There's no sign of infection. It should be fully healed in another twenty-four hours."_

_"Good. Take her back to her room. We'll schedule the next test for then."_

_"Sir?"_

_"You heard me, Lieutenant."_

_"Colonel Maybourne, with all due respect, sir, she needs time to recover."_

_"Do you think they'll be so forgiving if they come? They won't give us time to recover. It's obvious that firearms merely slow them down. Let's see how the goa'uld responds to biological weapons." A rough hand grabbed her hair, pulling her head back. She forced heavy eyes open, just to look her tormentor in the eyes. "What would you like first, Captain? Small pox, or maybe Ebola?"_

'Don't I?' Sam asked. 'You know what he did, you know what he was going to do to us. You remember him standing over us, planning what to do next. He stole my life, now tell me why I shouldn't take his in return?'

Jolinar surged to control, taking great care to make it as dramatic as possible. She deliberately flared Sam's eyes, sharing her host's pleasure in the abrupt paling of Maybourne's face. 'Because we are not like him,' she said softly. "If my host had her way, I would crush your neck like a bug. She wants you dead, but I prefer you alive. I want you to know that you owe your life to an alien. In the middle of the night when your dreams won't let you sleep I want you to remember that I OWN you. You live only because I let you live…and you will die the second that I decide you're not worth keeping around," she said, her cold voice resonating off the walls of the truck. She knocked him upside the head with the zat, letting him slump unconscious to the floor.

She turned, her eyes making out the form of Teal'c standing at the back of the truck. "We need to move," she said, hurrying towards him.

He dropped the helmet to the suit, breathing heavily. "Jolinar?"

She moved towards him, jumping out of the truck and pulling his arm across her shoulder. "It won't take them long to figure out something's happened. We need to get away from here."

"I…"

"I won't let them take you with them." Jolinar returned control to Sam. "Please," Sam said. "We'll find somewhere safe. Somewhere where they can't find you, where they can't hurt you."

He nodded, letting her pull him towards the trees. Within minutes they were gone, vanished into the wilderness, an abandoned biohazard suit the only sign that they'd been there.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack stood in the corner of the infirmary, his attention torn between the patients on the beds and the figures walking down the hall.

"I want her arrested. She accosted a superior officer," Maybourne complained loudly.

"I don't know about superior," Jack muttered, rolling his eyes. Inwardly he was kicking himself. He should have expected this from the second he heard Maybourne was on the base. Carter didn't get along with the man, no big surprise there. Not after what he'd done to her. Hell, Jack didn't get along with Maybourne on a good day, and this was far from a good day. But she'd just unwittingly thrown a monkey wrench the size of Colorado into their plans.

"Colonel O'Neill. Captain Carter assaulted my men and I and kidnapped Teal'c. In addition, she's potentially exposing the whole planet to a biohazard of unimaginable proportions. For all we know, this is a plot by that creature in her head."

"Blow it out your ear," Jack said, pushing off the wall, deliberately not looking at Fraiser.

"Excuse me?" Harry asked.

"Look, Maybourne. You and I both know Carter's got a damned good reason to hate your guts. And a damned good reason not to trust you any further than she can throw you."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Maybourne protested.

"Please," Jack sneered. He moved forward, looming over the colonel. "You took her, tortured her. And you were going to do the same thing to Teal'c," he accused. "I don't give a damn what kind of orders you have, you never should have been allowed to take him before, and as soon as we find them, you will lay your hands on them over my dead body," Jack said, leaning forward until Maybourne relented and pulled back, wincing as the movement jarred his broken arm.

"You don't have the authority."

"He may not, but I do."

Hearing Hammond's voice, Jack pulled back a bit. "Sir."

"General Hammond, I want to file a formal complaint against not only Captain Carter but also Colonel O'Neill," Maybourne said.

Hammond rolled his eyes, ignoring Maybourne and turning his attention to Jack. "Colonel O'Neill, you're in charge of the search teams. I want Captain Carter and Teal'c returned to this facility." He turned to Maybourne. "Colonel Maybourne, you are certainly welcome to file your complaints, but I am compelled to inform you that Captain Carter's status as an alien ambassador gives her immunity to prosecution. Now I see no sign of anything untoward happening here, unless of course someone here has any corroborating evidence." He pointedly looked at Janet.

"No, sir. I have nothing to report," she said. "The two colonels were merely talking."

Maybourne fumed while Jack stepped back. "Well then," Hammond said. "Colonel O'Neill, I suggest that you get to finding the missing members of your team. Colonel Maybourne, I imagine you would like to get your arm treated, so I suggest we leave the doctor to do her job." The general met Jack's eyes, nodding slightly. Taking the hint, Jack followed him from the room. "Do you have any idea where Carter would take Teal'c?" he asked softly once they were safely out of earshot.

Jack shook his head. "No, sir. She's smart enough not to just take him home. Why?"

"While I can certainly understand Carter's issues with Maybourne and the NID, the fact still remains that he's right, she is risking exposure to whatever is making Teal'c ill. We need to get them back here, now."

Jack shook his head. "You said…"

"Technically the NID is supposed to keep their hands off Carter, but if there are no witnesses, then they'll just deny all knowledge and we'll be right back where we started. Jack, if we can get them back here we can contain the disease and open up another option," he said meaningfully.

"General?"

"There is one place where the NID can't touch either of them."

"You mean to send them through the gate. Banish them off world."

"It's not the best option, but it is one place where I know they'll be safe," he said.

"I'll bring them back, sir," Jack promised. He turned and hurried down the hall.

"See that you do, colonel," Hammond said after him. "See that you do."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Teal'c paid scant attention to his surroundings, using all his concentration to keep placing one foot in front of the other. Pain radiated from his gut, spreading all throughout his body. He was hot, sweat streaming down his back, then in the next instant he was cold, the same sweat feeling like icicles drenching his clothes. He had never felt this badly in his life. Even the grievous wounds he'd sustained in battle over the years paled in comparison to how he felt now.

All he wanted to do was lie down and pray for the pain to fade. But he couldn't do that, she… they wouldn't let him. "Just a little bit further," she promised, tightening her grip around his waist. He didn't know who had spoken, the host or the Tok'ra. Oddly enough it didn't matter. She was his friend, and if one of them lacked the strength to do what was necessary, the other one wouldn't.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack pushed aside a branch, cursing under his breath as his boots skidded on some loose rock. So far, he and his teams had tracked Carter and Teal'c making their way away from the van and deep into the under brush. Fortunately there had been no shortage of volunteers, including Ferretti and Makepeace's Marines. Unfortunately, the lack of manpower wasn't a problem, it was the terrain. Realistically, they weren't that far out of Colorado Springs, however the landscape was rugged, rocks thinly covered by loose dirt and heavy vegetation.

More than once he'd wished for Teal'c and the Jaffa's incredible tracking abilities as he'd tried to follow his two missing teammates. The baying of a dog cut through the air and Jack stopped, shooting Ferretti a look.

"You gotta be kidding me," the major groused.

Jack sighed, wishing the man was wrong. "I wish I could say I was surprised."

"They're serious about taking them back, aren't they?" he asked.

"They're serious, Ferretti."

"Then we damn well better get there first, huh colonel?"

"We better, " Jack said. "Or the old man's gonna be pissed."

Urged on by the now imminent threat towards two of their own, they picked up the pace, hoping that they got there in time.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam pulled Teal'c along, her harsh breathing sounding abnormally loud in the quiet woods. They were struggling uphill, hoping desperately to put some distance between them and their pursuers. How the hell had they caught up with them so fast? Teal'c pulled away and she let him lean against a tree, accepting his silent request for rest.

'He does not look well.'

'I know.'

'His symbiote is not helping,' Jolinar said.

'We just need to let him rest. Junior can't heal him if he's concentrating on keeping him on his feet,' Sam said stubbornly. She ignored the skeptical feelings coming from her symbiote. He'd be ok; he had to be ok.

A wail filtered through the trees and she felt her heart lurch. "They wouldn't," she whispered.

'What?'

"Dogs. Those bastards are using dogs."

_Lying on a cot in her cell, desperately tired but afraid to sleep. The dead silence of the room pressing down on her, almost a physical presence. The walls were thick, heavy concrete that muffled any noise. Her heartbeat echoed in her ears and she fought to quiet it. She didn't want them to hear her, didn't want them to remember that she was here. If she stayed quiet enough, maybe they'd forget._

_Footsteps echoing up the hall, both human and animal. Their regular patrol her only way to tell time in the windowless room. Canine toenails clicking on the floor, ticking away like some furry metronome. Marking the time until they came for her again._

"We gotta move," she said, pulling Teal'c's arm over her shoulder. "If we can get to the highway, maybe they'll lose the scent."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Teal'c grunted, feeling his legs give out from under him. He heard Sam cry out, felt her pulled off balance by the sudden shift in weight. The baying of the dogs grew louder and he realized that there was nothing more he could do. "Go," he said, pushing her away.

"What? No." She reached out, struggling to pull him to his feet. "We're almost there."

"Do not die for me," he said. "You can evade them. Kill me." He reached out and covered her hand with his, bringing up the zat. She shook her head, trying to pull her hand from his as he pressed the trigger to arm the weapon. "My symbiote can not heal me. End it…now."

"No. No. We can get away. Teal'c don't."

"Jolinar, you know what you must do." He looked her in the eyes, seeing the host's fear replaced by the symbiote's determination. "Do it!" he yelled. He felt her finger tighten on the trigger, then her whole body spasmed and she fell forward, collapsing in front of him.

Exhausted, he fell, helpless to do anything but watch as they were surrounded.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam fell forward, pain raging throughout her chest. She struggled to move, her efforts halted when rough hands rolled her over, yanking the zat from her unresisting fingers. Dimly she realized she'd been shot, she felt the hot pooling of blood soaking the back of her shirt.

'Don't move,' the symbiote said. 'Let me check out the damage.'

She tried to look at Teal'c to see if he'd been shot as well but a hand grabbed her hair, pulling her head up. A person loomed over her, his sweat dripping off his face to land on hers. "Bitch," he spat. She frowned, not understanding the reason for his vehemence. "You don't recognize me, do you?" She shook her head slightly. "Typical," he sneered, reaching into his pocket. "Or have you killed so many people that you don't even remember them?"

'Jols?'

'I don't…' The symbiote broke off as he brought a syringe into her field of vision. 'This isn't good.'

"Lieutenant Matthew Brewer. He was fresh out of the academy, at his first assignment, Area 51…when you murdered him in cold blood." He stabbed the syringe into Sam's chest, emptying the contents into her. "I'll see you in hell."

In her mind, Jolinar screamed.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Apparently, Colonel Maybourne had some of his men waiting at Peterson. That's how they were able to get the head start in the search," Hammond said, looking around the briefing room table.

"It wasn't a search, it was a goddamned hunting party," Jack said, his disgust plain on his face. "Five more minutes and they'd have murdered both of them."

George didn't respond, knowing nothing he could say would help. O'Neill was right. Brewer and his men weren't simply searching for Carter and Teal'c, they had been hunting them down, a fact borne out by the fact that Carter had been shot in the back.

Fortunately, Jack and his team had caught up with them, preventing Brewer from completing his plans. They'd air lifted Teal'c and Carter back to the SGC and taken the men into custody.

"Janet?" Daniel said. Jack looked up, seeing Fraiser and Harlow walking into the room.

"Doctor?"

"Why do I think you don't have good news," Jack said, reading the expression on her face.

"Sir." She acknowledged the general. "I wish we did have better news. Captain Carter is stable, for now," she said.

"What does that mean?" Daniel asked.

"I thought the snake was supposed to fix stuff like that?" Ferretti asked.

"Normally, yes. A symbiote would aid in healing the wound. But in this case I don't think it'll help."

"We tested the substance in the syringe you brought back," Harlow said. "According to Doctor Fraiser, it is an Earth based version of the symbiote poison used by Sam to kill Amaunet."

"How the hell did they get their hands on that?" Jack asked.

"Do you mean Jolinar is dying?" Daniel said.

"I don't know, sir. And I don't know that either, Daniel. Right now the symbiote is in…the equivalent of a coma, her life signs are virtually non-existent."

"But Amaunet died within an hour of Captain Carter injecting it with the poison," Hammond said.

"Yes, sir. But Sam injected it directly into the symbiote. Captain Brewer injected Sam. And her body may have filtered some of it, which could be all that's keeping Jolinar alive."

"So all we need to do is wait for Jolinar to get better then she can heal Sam," Daniel said.

"It's not that easy, Doctor Jackson," Harlow said.

"In the last few months, Jolinar has become Sam's immune system. Normally this is a good thing. She's got an immunity to virtually any disease. Unfortunately, as long as Jolinar is in this coma, she can't help Sam," Janet said. "I'm already seeing the first signs of an infection. It's possible that IV antibiotics can clear it up. We'll have to wait and see."

"How about Teal'c?" Hammond asked.

"He's not much better," Janet said. "Junior seems to be slowing the progression of the change, but it's still happening."

"There has to be something we can do," Daniel said.

"Well, I have access to several variations of experimental RNA inhibitors which are being researched at the moment, and combined with the natural healing abilities of the symbiote..." Harlow spoke up.

"How does that help Teal'c?"

"It's possible that I can use the inhibitors to reverse the change."

"Then do it," Jack said.

Harlow looked at Janet. "Using just the inhibitors won't work. What I really need is access to the creature's venom," he said.

"Oh man," Jack said, running his hand through his hair. "You would have to say that."

"Are you sure it's the only way, Doctor?" Hammond asked.

"I'm afraid so, General."

"I'll go get one," Ferretti offered.

"Me too," Daniel said.

"Colonel?" Hammond asked Jack.

"If that's what it takes," Jack said.

"Very well, you can leave when ready." Hammond got up from the table, signaling an end to the briefing.

Jack watched him go, then turned to the remainder of his team. "Let's go hunt some bugs, kids."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Pain, cold piercing pain radiating through her back. Why did it hurt? It shouldn't hurt. 'Jolinar, it hurts,' she said. 'Make it stop hurting."

Only silence greeted her request, puzzling her. She never stayed quiet. At times, Jolinar could be called chatty, always curious about Earth and the things she saw. More than once, she'd had to jump-start Sam's metabolism to compensate for an ice cream binge or one too many trips through the buffet.

'Jolinar, come on, give me a hand here,' Sam said, biting her lip.

Still getting no response, Sam concentrated, trying to turn her mind inwards. They had to be in the infirmary, she recognized the smells and sounds. She fought the light-headedness of painkillers, digging deep into her mind to touch Jolinar's consciousness.

She entered a virtual hall, rows of doors as far as she could see. That was how they divided up Sam's mind, doors and rooms, some open, some closed, some public, some private. They each had their own place, their own space. A refuge when they wanted their privacy

Jolinar hadn't shared everything with Sam, and said she never would. A fair exchange considering that Sam had her secrets as well. She walked down the hall, her footsteps echoing off barren walls. Reaching Jolinar's room, Sam knocked, calling out softly.

Still not getting a response, she tried the doorknob that refused to move under her hands. Fear merging with panic, she tried harder, twisting and jerking. She pounded on the door, calling out, desperate for a reply.

Her pleas remained unanswered

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Janet knocked on the door, taking one last glance at the papers in her hand, hoping against hope that they'd change.

"Come," Hammond said.

She took a deep sigh and opened the door, stepping into the general's office. "Sir."

"Doctor. Please, have a seat," he offered. Janet sat down, unable to meet his eyes. "You don't have good news, do you?" he said.

She shook her head. "No, sir. I wish I did. My latest test results show that the antibiotics are having little effect. The infection is progressing and I can't stop it," she said, her voice choking a bit.

"I'm sure you've done all you can," Hammond soothed.

"No, sir. I haven't," she said. He shot her an alarmed look. "My theory is that it's Jolinar that's suppressing Sam's immune system. If we remove, or kill her…there's a chance Sam could recover."

"Then why haven't you?"

"Sam won't let me, sir." Janet glanced down at her hands, then back up to look him in the eyes. "She says they'll either live together, or die together."

"I see," George said.

"Sir," Janet said after a minute. "Normally when a member of the SGC is seriously wounded, we transfer them to the Academy Hospital so that their family can visit…"

George shook his head. "We can't do that. Not as long as she's blended. I can't run the risk of Jolinar's existence becoming public knowledge," he said. "We were barely able to contain the knowledge of the Stargate program when we transferred the Nasyians to the hospital a few months ago."

"I know, sir. I honestly don't even know if Sam has any family. She never talks about them. But General, she is dying. Is the secrecy of this program worth a lifetime of regret and unanswered questions?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam slowly opened her eyes, using her hearing to confirm where she was. Over the low murmur of a radio, she heard the faint sounds of a baby. Turning her head, she saw Daniel sitting in a chair, Hrabe playing on his lap.

Somehow, despite the odd circumstances of his conception and birth, the child seemed to be coming out pleasingly normal. If she didn't know he was the child of two goa'uld, born and bred among the stars, she wouldn't be able to tell. He was perched on Daniel's lap, his tiny hands wrapped around a bright yellow plastic rattle that he was swinging around.

She watched Daniel play with him, his love for the boy clear on his face. It was amazing how he'd accepted him, the simple fact that he was Shau'ri's child being more than enough to win him a place in her friend's heart.

So far, Hrabe had been perfectly healthy, nothing more than a normal little human boy. She should tell Daniel, warn him. Or should she? Maybe Jolinar had been wrong. What if the whole Harcesis thing had just been a myth. If she told them, they'd never look at Hrabe the same again. They'd watch him, monitor him. And god forbid if the NID got wind of it.

Maybe she shouldn't say anything. Pray for the best. That had been her original plan, but that plan had been conceived when she knew she'd be around for the next twenty years or so to keep an eye on the boy. That wasn't going to happen now. She would never see him grow up, she knew that with complete certainty.

Jolinar had been silent ever since she'd woken up three days ago, her coma like state reducing her to a physical presence only. And that presence was lessening day by day, muted further by the painkillers she was on. The gunshot wound wasn't healing, in fact, according to Janet, it was getting worse.

Janet had suggested that if the symbiote were to die or be removed, maybe Sam's immune system would reassert itself. But Sam couldn't do it. There was still a chance Jolinar could overcome the poison, and she couldn't kill her while there was still a chance. Jolinar hadn't abandoned her, and she couldn't abandon her friend. As far as she was concerned, they would live together or die together. For some reason, that thought didn't scare her. She felt oddly at peace with her forthcoming death. There was a certain relief in removing the uncertainty from life.

"Hey? You're awake."

"Hey Daniel. Is Hrabe ok?"

"Oh, yeah, he's fine. It's time for Shau'ri's check up. And since Abydonians aren't big on babysitters, Robbie here came in too." He picked the child up and sat him on the edge of the bed where Sam could reach out and touch him. "Besides, last week the general was hinting that he really wanted to see him."

"He's getting so big." She traced the embroidered Winnie the Pooh on the front of his over-alls. Through some quirk of genetics, he'd inherited his mother's coloring, coffee colored skin and dark hair, but had brilliant green eyes. "How's Teal'c?"

"Doctor Harlow's serum is working. According to him and Janet, the changes to his DNA are…undoing, or however they say it. He's going to be fine," he reassured her.

"That's good." She closed her eyes, fighting the pull of the drugs. Usually she hated the fuzzy headed feeling she got from narcotics. But not now, now she welcomed it. It made it easier for her to ignore the distinct lack of feeling from elsewhere in her body. Janet said she thought the swelling would go down and she was sure the symbiote could fix the damage to her back. Right now, Sam didn't care. Either Jolinar would wake up and fix her and she'd walk again, or they'd both die. Life was rather simple when it boiled down to one of two decisions. It was neater that way, like a computer program. Ones and zeros, yes or no, life or death.

"Danyel?" Sam opened her eyes to see Shau'ri step into the room. "Doctor Fraiser said you were here."

"Shau'ri. You all done?" Daniel stood up, taking Hrabe in his arms.

"Yes," she said, stepping forward to take the child from him. "Samantha," she acknowledged, barely sparing Sam a look.

"Shau'ri, hi," Sam said, studying the woman. She looked strange, different from all the times before. Gone were her Abydonian robes or goa'uld finery. Instead she was wearing a flowing peasant skirt and t-shirt.

She looked happy and content, although Sam could pick out shadows in her dark eyes. Shadows that told of hardship and horrors, memories that haunted her, that would likely always haunt her. "How are you getting along?"

"Your planet is a truly wonderful place. It's so…big," she said.

"You should have seen her the first time we used the microwave," Daniel said, laughing. "I've created a monster when it comes to microwave popcorn. I should buy stock in the company."

Sam smiled, imagining the puzzlement of a person suddenly thrust into the modern world. She'd done that with Jolinar. It had reawakened Sam's fascination with technology to see it through Jolinar's wondrous eyes. It was amazing how a millennia old creature could still be fascinated by instant coffee and satellite TV.

"That's good," Sam said.

"We should go," Daniel said after a minute. "Get Robbie home in time for dinner." They said their goodbyes and left Sam alone in the room. Closing her eyes, she focused on the music coming from the radio, suddenly realizing how different it was not to have to explain the lyrics to someone, and how much she missed it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

George parked his car, pausing for a minute, dreading what was coming. He should have expected the phone call, Jake was actually overdue for his monthly, deliberately casual phone call, the one where they chatted for about twenty minutes about old times and recent events before they got down to the real reason for the call. The oh so casual mention of Carter's name, the gentle inquiry that was really a desperate plea for information, any crumbs of knowledge George could drop in his lap.

Sighing, he got out of his car, walking into the small coffee shop. Jake was sitting at a table in the corner, a paper cup of coffee sitting in front of him. George nodded and purchased a drink, quickly joining his friend. "Jacob."

"George. Nice of you to come." George sat down, shifting a bit to get comfortable on the absurdly tiny chair. "You remember when the only way to have coffee was either with sugar, cream or instant? None of this espresso, half-caf, decaf, mocha crap," Jacob groused.

George chuckled. "Black is still the only way to drink it." He picked his up, taking off the irritating plastic lid. "What's wrong, Jacob?" he asked seriously.

"Who says anything has to be wrong?"

"Thirty years, Jacob. And you've never lied to me. Not even about that girl in Saigon…what was her name?"

Jacob laughed. "A gentleman never tells," he said, looking down. "How's Sam?" he asked seriously, abruptly changing the subject.

George shook his head. "You know I can't talk about it."

"Jesus Christ, George. I'm not asking for your mission statement, I just want to know about my little girl," Jacob said.

George opened his mouth, the well rehearsed cover stories ready to trip off his tongue, and then he stopped. This wasn't one of Jacob's normal fishing expeditions. There was something different about his friend, something in his eyes that wasn't usually there. His shoulders were more stooped, his demeanor calm, his banter forced. "What's wrong, Jacob," he asked again.

"What are you talking about?"

"Jacob."

"I got cancer, George," Jake said, his voice calm and accepting.

"Oh Jacob," George said, his heart sinking as he heard the words he so desperately didn't want to hear.

"There's nothing like imminent death to put your priorities in order," Jake said, shaking off his friend's concern. "I can't do much about Mark, but I do want to make sure my daughter is ok. That's all I'm asking."

George looked down at his cooling coffee. His duty was to protect the program, preserve the secrecy of the Stargate. So much of his life had revolved around secrets, keeping them, breaking them, hiding them. Like so many times before, friendship was supposed to take a backseat to his duty, his job, his life.

More than once, he'd been prepared to die to protect the project, to save his planet. And now his duty demanded that he let his best friend, his partner during so many nightmarish raids into enemy territory, go to his grave alone and miserable to save the program. No. If there was one thing he'd learned in his life was that duty didn't mean much if it came at the cost of your soul. "Come on," he said, pushing his chair back.

"George?" Jacob frowned up at him.

"You want to know how Sam is? Why don't you come see her?"

"I don't understand." Jake stared up at his friend.

"You will, Jacob. You will," he said, pulling the man to his feet and leading him from the coffee shop.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The klaxons blared and Jack hurried down the stairs. "Whatcha got?" he asked.

"SG-7, sir," Davis said. "And they're two days early."

"Get a medical team down there," Jack ordered. "Open the iris." He watched the four members of SG-7 plus one stagger down the ramp, looking more a little roughed up.

"Close the iris!" Major Henderson yelled.

"Do it," Jack ordered. He made his way down to the gate room, giving the stranger an appraising look. The woman was dressed in torn and stained clothes and Jack could see bruises coloring her skin. "Major? What happened? Who's your guest?"

"Colonel. It turns out P2R458 wasn't exactly goa'uld free. Soon after we arrived, Cronos showed up. He captured us, but we managed to escape, thanks to Anise here." Henderson indicated the woman.

"Really?"

"She was a prisoner there too, sir," Captain Kenner said. "She helped us find our way out, without a fire fight."

"You are in command of this facility?" she asked.

"Right now I am. Thank you for helping our people," Jack said sincerely.

"Any enemy of the goa'uld is a friend of mine. I would like to return to my home," she said.

Jack looked to Henderson who shrugged slightly. "We convinced her that it'd be safer if she came here first, sir. I thought we could at least trade her a hot meal and a check up in gratitude for helping us out." Jack read his silent message, that the major thought there was more to the woman than met the eye. "The major has a point," he said. "Why don't you let our doctor look you over. We can probably even scare up a shower and something to eat, then we can send you home," Jack suggested.

"That is not necessary," she said.

"Please, it's the least we can do to thank you for helping us out."

She hesitated another minute, then sighed. "Very well," she agreed.

The rest of Henderson's team ushered her from the room. "She did save our sixes, sir," he said.

Jack sighed. "I know. There's just…there's something odd about her."

"Sir?"

Jack shook his head. "Never mind. Go get checked out, but keep an eye on her," he ordered.

"Yes, sir." The man left the gate room and Jack looked down at his watch. General Hammond should be back any time now and Jack wondered how the man would deal with this newest problem.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Teal'c sat in the chair, lightly meditating as he kept his vigil. It was a vigil he and his teammates had been keeping for the last week, himself joining in a few days ago when Doctor Fraiser pronounced him cured.

He knew his friend was dying, and it grieved him. She'd been injured in an attempt to keep him from harm, and that was a debt he could never repay.

He knew Doctor Fraiser held out hope that the symbiote would perish, thus giving Captain Carter's body a chance to heal itself, however that was not to be the case. Both host and symbiote were alive, although barely.

He knew they had formed a tight bond during her imprisonment, he had just not realized how close they were. They were both prepared to die for the other, an act he found as distressing as he did honorable.

"Teal'c." Her voice was barely above a whisper. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes glazed with a combination of fever and drugs. He knew it would not be long now before the toxins in her body killed her, something Doctor Fraiser called septic shock.

"Captain Carter. Do you require something?" He leaned forward, taking her limp hand in his.

"Hrabe," she whispered. "Watch him."

"I do not understand. Hrabe is not here."

She shook her head. "No. Watch him, guard him. Harcesis," she said, not able to keep her eyes open.

"Captain Carter?" He broke off, an odd feeling tingling down his spine. He got up, walking to the door. He opened it, coming face to face with a young blond women, flanked by SG-7.

"Kree shak, Jaffa," she said, pushing past him.

"Major Henderson, who is this person?"

"She helped us escape," the major said, following Teal'c back into the room.

The woman was standing over Captain Carter's bed, her hand on the woman's forehead. "What have you done to her?" she demanded.

To his surprise, he saw Captain Carter open her eyes, blinking to focus them. "Nise?" she muttered.

"Who are you?" the woman demanded.

"She is Captain Samantha Carter, host to Jolinar of Malkshur," Teal'c said, moving closer to the woman. "And you are goa'uld."

"No. I am not," the woman said. "If your name is Teal'c then you are the sholva and these are the Tau'ri," she said, motioning at the gathered humans.

"Ok," Henderson said, stepping forward. "So you know us. How about returning the favor. Who the hell are you?"

"My name is Anise, my host is Freya and I am Tok'ra," she said. "What have you done to her?" she demanded.

"We did not do anything," Teal'c said. "Both host and symbiote were injured by someone else. We have been attempting to heal them."

"Perhaps I can help," she offered.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

She sat on the floor, her knees pulled close to her chest. She heard a noise, but she didn't open her eyes. There was nothing to see, nothing but an empty hall. It'd been like that the past few days, the doors fading away, melding into the plain white walls of her mind. The doors were all gone now, all but one. She was trapped in here, trapped with the door at her back the only way out. An escape route that had remained stubbornly closed.

She heard another sound, a faint noise echoing off the bare walls. "Sam?" Who was there? No one was ever there, it was just her and the silence.

The lock rattled and she frowned, feeling the steady presence at her back shift. 'You should answer him.'

'Jols?' Sam's eyes flew open and she spun, staring in amazement as the door opened. 'I thought you were gone?'

'No,' she said softly, wrapping Sam in a warm embrace. 'I'm still here. I'll always be here.'

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam sat on the picnic table, contentedly turning her face to the sun. So long, it'd been so long since she'd seen the sun.

'It is bad for your skin you know,' Jolinar teased.

'Then fix it,' Sam replied, stretching out her legs to expose more of her body to the warming rays. She could feel the first tingling of sunburn, but she didn't care. It felt too good to stop.

She'd dreamed of this, basking in the sun, so many times during the past month. She'd spent so much of that time either flat on her back or recovering that she literally couldn't remember the last time she'd felt this good.

Jolinar still hadn't totally recovered from their ordeal, the symbiote sleeping most of the time. Sam was a little better. Her back still ached and she still took some prescription antibiotics and vitamins, but she was basically healthy. Janet thought it'd take her another month or so to fully recover from their near death experience.

"Beer?"

She opened her eyes, reaching out to take the cold bottle from Jack. "Thanks." She took a drink, savoring the bitter taste of the alcohol.

'Ick. How can you drink that?' Jolinar complained.

'It's an acquired taste.'

"Dad getting along ok?" he asked, sitting beside her.

Sam nodded. "Yeah. Anise was showing him around. He and Selmac seem to be getting along," she said referring to her father's recent blending.

"So, you gonna turn this snake in the head stuff into a family affair?"

"God, I hope not," she said, running her fingers through her hair.

'Hey.'

'Hush.'

She took another drink as she stared across the lawn. It was Cassie's thirteenth birthday and Jack had declared that every Earth girl had to have a birthday party to celebrate their passage into being a teenager.

Sam knew this wasn't the 'official' party that was being held at Janet's house Saturday night. This was just a small gathering to allow Cassie to celebrate with her adopted family, SG-1 and their loved ones.

"It's a nice party, Jack," she said. "I think Cassie is having fun."

Jack snorted. "She's humoring us because she knows adults buy better presents than her friends." She shot him a skeptical look. "Hey, I remember when I was a kid. You figure this stuff out at an early age."

She chuckled, watching Teal'c baby-sit Hrabe while Daniel tried his hand at grilling burgers, with Shau'ri at his side. 'Tell him,' Jolinar requested.

'About Robbie? I thought we were waiting?'

'Not that, the other thing.'

'Oh.' Sam took a deep breath, then tipped her bottle, gulping down a little dutch courage. "I'm sorry, Colonel," she said, turning to face him.

"About what?"

"About not trusting you. About running away with Teal'c. It was stupid, I…we, nearly exposed the whole planet to those bugs."

"Yeah, you did," he agreed quietly.

"I wasn't thinking, I couldn't think of anything beyond keeping him out of Maybourne's hands," she continued.

"We did have a plan, you know," he said.

"You did?"

Jack nodded. "Maybourne's made a few enemies in the last few months, possibly more than his friends can protect him from. The one thing we needed was proof. I mean, what happened to you was….bad…"

"But it's my word against his," she said. "You have proof about what happened, just not who did it."

"Yeah," he said. "We had someone on the inside, they were going to get us the proof we needed to toss Harry into a cell for the next century or so."

"And I screwed that up," she said with a heavy sigh. "Did Teal'c know?"

Jack shook his head. "We never had a chance to tell him…or you."

"So, now what?"

"We wait. Either Harry's learned his lesson, or he'll try again."

"I'm sorry, sir. I just thought if I acted alone, I'd keep the SGC out of it."

"We were already in it, from the second Teal'c came back infected, we were involved. You know, Carter, you don't have to play the lone ranger. We're here to back you up, you just have to let us," he said, getting up from his seat and walking away.

'He is angry,' Jolinar said.

'Yeah. He trusts me, us, and I didn't trust him. He doesn't take betrayal well.'

'You should warn him,' she said, directing Sam's gaze towards Teal'c and Hrabe.

'What if we're wrong? What if he's a normal little boy?' Sam asked, horrified at the ramifications of their decision. If they were right, they would be warning their friends of a potential danger. If they were wrong, they'd be destroying Daniel and Shau'ri's lives, not to mention their friendship.

'What if he's not?' Jolinar asked as Sam watched Teal'c play with the boy. The Jaffa was lying on his back in the grass, Hrabe sitting on his stomach, his favorite yellow rattle clutched in his chubby hands. He muttered and giggled, rambling on in innocent baby talk, occasionally hitting Teal'c with the rattle. 'What if they have a monster in their midst, a monster in the guise of innocence.'

No one else was watching his antics. Cassie and Janet were just coming outside, carrying the plates and condiments for the burgers while Jack busied himself lighting the citronella candles to discourage the mosquitoes.

Hrabe giggled loudly, laughing as Teal'c tickled his stomach. Tired of being assaulted by the rattle, they watched him gently take it from the child, laying it safely out of reach. Hrabe stared at it, his small face creasing into a frown. "Gime jova," he said reaching forward.

Daniel and Shau'ri turned. "Did he just talk?" Daniel asked, kneeling by his son.

"I believe so Daniel Jackson, " Teal'c agreed as Shau'ri pulled her son off Teal'c's chest. The baby cuddled up to his mother, then reached out one grubby hand, stretching for the rattle. "Gime," he said again.

"Which of your twenty-three languages is that, Daniel?" Jack teased.

Daniel shook his head. "He didn't get it from me."

'No, he didn't,' Jolinar said, her dread spilling over to Sam.

'He got it from his father,' Sam agreed, gimme Sholva, still echoing in her ears. 'His real father.'

Fin


	3. Paid in Full

Many, many thanks to Adi for all her help. Her pragmatism and ceaseless questions help to keep this story in line. Thanks to Sel for her help and insight.

Paid in Full

By

Denise

'Are you sure about this?' Jolinar asked her host as they stood awkwardly down the hall from the general's office.

'We have to. We have no choice,' Sam said resignedly.

'You wanted to wait, be certain before we said anything,' Jolinar reminded.

'Remember what happened? How close we came to dying? We can't take that risk. Someone else needs to know.'

'We're taking a risk by saying anything. There is still a spy in the SGC,' the symbiote reminded.

'Maybe,' Sam said. 'Maybe not. We can't know for sure.'

'You're risking his life,' Jolinar insisted, her dislike of Sam's decision plain. They'd been arguing about it for a week, ever since the picnic when they'd heard Hrabe speak, recognizing goa'uld words in his childish gibberish.

'If I don't say something, if WE don't say something, we're risking the planet. And I will not do that,' Sam said, firming her resolve. Jolinar knew the only way she'd stop her host would be to wrest control form her and openly prevent her from speaking. And that was a step she couldn't take, especially knowing that her host was right. If Hrabe was what they thought he was, Earth was in danger. And Jolinar had witnessed too many massacres to be the cause of one.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"You really expect me to believe that?" Jack demanded, shooting to his feet. He ignored the grimaces of the other people in the room, pacing in lieu of shouting.

"Colonel," Hammond said tiredly.

"Colonel, Teal'c can back me up on this," Sam said, tamping down on her ire. "So can Jolinar for that matter."

"Oh, yeah, right. Let's take the snake's word for it," Jack said, too angry to acknowledge the looks on his co-workers' faces.

'He just might like me, once he gets to know me,' Jolinar said, Sam's like of her CO tempering the symbiote's hurt feelings.

"Colonel O'Neill," Hammond barked, jumping to Sam's defense.

Sam's eyes flared dramatically as she jumped to her feet. "I have not lied to you," Jolinar said, resonating Sam's voice.

"Excuse me?" Jack asked. "I seem to remember a little disappearing act a few weeks ago."

"I have never lied to you," she insisted slowly, accentuating the word.

"Ok," he said. "How long have you known," he demanded, asking the question everyone wanted to know the answer to.

'He's not going to like this,' Sam said to Jolinar as she studied the people in the room. General Hammond was seated at his normal place at the head of the table. Teal'c and Janet on the other side of the table and Jack had been sitting beside her, but was now pacing in front of the windows, staring broodingly down at the gate.

'We knew that. But they have to know,' the symbiote said.

'I know.' She took a deep breath, taking control back. "Jolinar has suspected since she heard of the circumstances of Hrabe's conception." She spoke fast, eager to tell her side of the story before he erupted again. "The idea of a Harcesis is legendary even among the Tok'ra. It's…it's like proving the existence of Noah's Ark. We didn't know for sure if the legend was real."

"This is why you did not share this information prior to this," Teal'c said.

Sam nodded. "We didn't want to draw attention to Robbie if there was no reason for it. Chances are, he'd be a normal little boy."

"Something happened to change your mind," Hammond said.

"Yes, sir. At the picnic last week, when Robbie was playing with Teal'c, he said something."

Janet shook her head. "He's barely talking. It's more gibberish than words."

"He called me sholva," Teal'c said quietly, causing the others to look at him.

Sam nodded somberly. "Yeah."

"He's nine months old," Jack said, walking back to the table. "For crying out loud, Charlie said his first curse word at nine months. Kids mimic," he insisted.

"Children mimic what they hear," Janet said. "Do you really think Sholva has been a part of Shau'ri and Daniel's vocabulary?"

"It's a stretch, I know," Sam admitted. "There is also the fact that Hrabe is nine months old and is talking and walking."

"He's a smart kid."

"Do you think he got those smarts from his mother, or Apophis," Sam said coldly. "Or more accurately the 3,000 host Apophis was in. He's the biological father of the boy."

"Captain," Hammond said warningly.

"Sir," Sam said. "I admit the evidence is purely circumstantial, but it's not something we can ignore. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think so. And neither does Jolinar. If Robbie is a Harcesis, he possesses the knowledge of every host that Apophis has been in. And the knowledge of every goa'uld in his bloodline, Amaunet's bloodline and any other goa'uld they've bred with. That child has thousands, maybe hundreds of thousands of years of cumulative knowledge in his brain. He also has the goa'uld desire for power and more than likely the nasty little cruel streak they have too."

"Sounds like this child could be an incredible resource," Hammond said.

"This child is a great danger," Teal'c said.

"Danger?" Jack said. "He's not even out of diapers yet."

"Colonel, imagine Hitler with present day or better yet, goa'uld technical knowledge. Hrabe sees humans as a resource. And he wants nothing more than to rise to power and rule the puny humans of this planet. He's a time bomb in our midst," she said. She reached out and took Jack's arm, making him turn to face her. "Colonel, you've been angry at me for keeping secrets. We could have kept this secret. We could have stood back and watched and waited and taken action twenty years down the line. But we didn't. We chose to speak up now, before it's too late. Maybe something can be done. The point is, sir. If we know the danger's among us, then it won't surprise us," she said sincerely.

Jack sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "That's why you didn't want Daniel here."

She nodded. "Amaunet may have known about Hrabe. And she may have left that knowledge in Shau'ri's mind. If Daniel knows, he'll have to lie to her." She turned to the general. "Sir, I'd like Janet to run some tests on Hrabe."

"What kind of tests?"

"It's possible that being a Harcesis has a biological basis. If we can find a cause, maybe we can find a cure."

Hammond looked to Janet. "Doctor?"

Janet shrugged. "I can check on him. I have no idea what I'm looking for." She looked to Sam.

"I don't either. In truth, the existence of a Harcesis has never been proven. But isn't it worth a shot?"

Hammond nodded. "Very well. Doctor, proceed. And although I'm not comfortable with it, I agree with Captain Carter's assessment. Let's see how far we can proceed without informing Doctor Jackson or his wife of the possibility of the Harcesis." He got to his feet. "Dismissed."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I do not understand, Danyel," Shau'ri said, sitting on the bed, her son in her lap. "He is healthy."

"Well, we don't always wait for someone to be unhealthy before we see the doctor," Daniel replied, frowning at Janet's nervous smile. The summons to bring Hrabe in for a check up had been surprising, to say the least. His son didn't have a civilian physician, but General Hammond had arranged for one of the doctors at the Academy Hospital to be the child's pediatrician in deference to Shau'ri's status and the unique circumstances surrounding his birth.

"Daniel's right, Shau'ri. We just want to make sure this little fellow's ok," Janet said, reaching for her syringe. "We're almost done. I just want to take a quick blood sample."

"Blood?" Shau'ri asked, alarmed. She wrapped her arms more tightly around her son. The child picked up on the increase in tension, starting to fuss.

"It's ok," Daniel soothed. "I've had it done dozens of times. It won't hurt him."

She frowned skeptically, but nodded her head, giving her assent for the test. Daniel stepped closer, knowing that the worst was yet to come when Robbie started to cry. Janet leaned over Robbie, gently taking his chubby leg and expertly finding a vein.

Surprisingly, Robbie didn't cry, he merely frowned, staring intently as the red fluid filled the syringe. Daniel met Janet's shocked gaze as the doctor quickly gathered her samples. "All done," she said, holding a cotton ball over the small wound, quickly securing it with a Band-Aid.

"Told you it'd be ok," Daniel said to his wife.

"We can go now?" she asked.

"Yes," Janet said. "I'll let you know if I find anything, but I'm not worried." She leaned in, tickling Hrabe under the chin. "You're a very healthy boy."

"He's a very ornery boy," Daniel said, holding him so Shau'ri could get off the bed. She stood up, straightening her long skirt then held out her arms for Hrabe. "You should see him chasing Sparky around the house," Daniel said, referring to the Labrador puppy they'd bought to keep Hrabe and Shau'ri company while he was at work.

"Just wait," Janet said. "They call them the Terrible Two's for a reason."

He set Hrabe down and the boy toddled over to his mother, digging his fists into her skirt in the timeless 'pick me up' gesture. "He is hungry," she said, taking the boy in her arms.

Daniel looked at his watch. "I've got to grab a few things and take them home with me to translate," he said, referring to his arrangement with the general. The man had allowed Daniel to take some items to his house and work there, permitting him to get work done while still helping Shau'ri make the transition to living on Earth. "Can I take you guys to the commissary? You can get Robbie some lunch and I'll gather my things and meet you there."

Shau'ri's face fell a bit, clearly not fond of the idea. Although she was slowly adapting to life among the Tau'ri, she clearly was not comfortable in the military atmosphere of the SGC. "They do not have much that he likes," she said.

"They've got cereal and fruit," Daniel said. "All he needs is a snack. Hon, I can't have him running around my lab. He broke something last time."

Shau'ri nodded. "We will go get him something to eat." He led her out of the room and to the elevators, quickly making their way to the commissary. He got them settled, and complying with the general's orders, informed one of the SF's at the door that he was leaving her alone, then hurried towards his lab, hoping that he could gather all he needed and make arrangements to get it home before Hrabe got done eating.

A bit of him felt guilty at leaving Shau'ri alone, but he knew he had to. Even though she wasn't comfortable at the SGC, she needed to learn to be comfortable. She'd been having a hard time lately, more than once experiencing some of Amaunet's memories.

After the second week of sleepless nights, he'd finally broken down and talked to Sam, or more accurately, Jolinar through his teammate. The centuries old creature hadn't had much information to offer since cases of hosts surviving symbiotes was rare, even among the Tok'ra. The only theory she could offer was that as Amaunet died, she left some of her memories in Shau'ri's mind, much like an after image burned on a retina. The memories may fade, or they may always be a part of his wife.

He attributed her dislike of the SGC and especially Sam to those memories. Amaunet saw the Tau'ri as her enemies, and Sam especially more so due to Jolinar. He hoped that by exposing her to those things, she'd eventually overcome Amaunet's memories. Maybe then, it would no longer be necessary for her to be escorted at all times when she was in the SGC. Fortunately, the SF's were such a part of the scenery, he didn't think she even noticed that when she wasn't with him, she was always followed.

Taking a quick glance at his watch, he unlocked his office. He'd have to hurry. He figured he had about twenty minutes before Robbie was bored to tears and creating a scene.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Shau'ri tried for the third time to soothe her child, his fussiness reaching unmanageable levels. It hadn't taken him long to eat his banana and a cookie, washing it down with some milk.

She reached for the bag they used for Hrabe's spare diapers and toys, frowning when she couldn't find it. She closed her eyes in frustration. It had to be in the infirmary. She remembered setting it down on the floor. She got to her feet and looked towards the door, sighing when she didn't see Daniel. Hrabe threw his milk carton down, a few drops scattering across the table. Suddenly angry, Shau'ri got to her feet, quickly gathering up her son. She would just go and get his bag, along with his toys, then meet Daniel in his office.

She hurried through the door, stopping short when a guard stood in front of her. "Can I help you?" he offered.

"No. I do not need any help," she said, clutching Hrabe close. The man didn't move, standing directly in her path. "I just wish to retrieve my bag from the infirmary," she finally said in an effort to get him to stand aside.

"This place can be confusing. Why don't I take you there," he offered, his tone pleasant but firm.

"I know how to get there," she insisted.

"I know ma'am but…I have orders." He stepped aside, indicating for her to go first. Feeling more than a little embarrassed, she gave in, letting the man escort her to the infirmary. She kept her eyes down, feeling the curious gazes of the people they passed, staring at her as if they expected her to do something horrible.

Her cheeks burning she walked into the infirmary, grateful to see her bag sitting on the middle of one of the beds. She snagged it up, shifting Hrabe on her hip and reaching in for one of his toys.

She handed it to him and was walking back towards the hall and the waiting guard when a quiet conversation reached her ears.

"Sam, I don't even know what I'm looking for," she heard Doctor Fraiser complain.

"Neither do we. I think it's sorta like porn, I'll know it when I see it," Captain Carter said.

"And if he is what you think he is?"

There was a pause and a woman sighed. "I don't know."

"It's not fair to persecute him for what he MIGHT do," the doctor said.

"Janet, I know but…what if he IS Harcesis?"

"There you are." Shau'ri looked up, gasping a bit as she saw Daniel walk into the room. "Are you ok?" he asked.

"Yes," she glanced guiltily towards the partially opened door, wondering if they realized that they'd been overheard. "I…Hrabe wanted his toy," she said, holding up the bag as proof.

"I know. I'm sorry I forgot," he apologized, stepping forward to take it from her. "Janet called me and I was going to come get it, but then it took longer than I expected to transfer the files I was going to work on and…I'm sorry," he said, smiling at her. "Are you ready to go?" he asked.

Silently she nodded, casting one last pensive glance at the door as she followed him into the hall.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Do you realize what you ask of me?" Amaunet asked, looking up at her husband as he walked across their chambers, two goblets and a pitcher of wine clasped loosely in his hands.

"I ask for little," he said, holding out the goblets. She took them, freeing his hand so he could maneuver his robes to join her on the large bed.

"You ask for me, for my host, to conceive a child with you," she said, holding out the goblets so he could fill them with drink.

"It would only be a temporary condition, a few months. A mere blink of an eye," he said, setting down the pitcher. "I have been told that many women cherish their pregnancies, thriving upon the feelings of a new life growing within them."

"My host has no issue with the conception or pregnancy, although, in truth, you are not the man she would choose to be the father of her child," Amaunet said.

"Since when do the feelings of the host matter?" Apophis asked arrogantly.

"My love. For this pregnancy to succeed, I must withdraw, returning control to the host. The child will be conceived with her, carried by her. It will not be my child, it will be hers…and yours," she said, trying to hide the betrayal she felt. She loved her husband and could not understand the allure of creating a human child.

She knew the act was forbidden, that the greatest sin a goa'uld could commit was the creation of a Harcesis. That did not frighten her. Her God was powerful enough to protect her. What concerned her was leaving her host in control, becoming a voyeur to her husband and the body she inhabited. What if he decided he preferred the host to her? What if he desired more children, condemning her to year after year in exile?

"No," he said, reaching out to cradle her face. "It will be OURS. Your host is merely a vessel. She…serves a purpose. And for that, she is compensated. Ask her? If she were on her home planet, what would her life be like? Ceaseless toil and labor. Privations and suffering. She would be dead in a few years, her health and beauty destroyed. But here, here she can have all she wants." He motioned around the room, pointing out the luxurious surroundings. "Here she will never know hunger or pain. She will be cared for for the rest of her life. She will learn all that you wish to teach her. And for that, all she has to do is give her body to you. It seems a small price to pay."

"And your host?" she asked. "What does your host think? He will have to participate as well."

"My host does what I tell him to," Apophis said smugly.

She shook her head slightly. "How?"

"What is the one thing your host wants, more than anything?"

"To go back to her husband," Amaunet said, not even having to think about it.

"And what if she were to be back with her husband? What is the first thing she would do?" he asked knowingly.

"But how?"

"Do you know what I do on those rare occasions when my host is being obstinate? I let him see what I want him to see." He reached out and stroked her bare arm. "He will do anything to see his wife again, feel her soft skin. If he sees what he wants, he does what I want."

She smiled, her gaze turning inward as she attempted the manipulation of her host's perceptions for the first time. Her vision wavered as she saw through her host's eyes, the dark face of her god melting into the pale face of her host's love. "Do you see?" he asked in a different voice.

"Yes. This will not harm the child?"

"No." He shook his head. "Sibwa, you are so beautiful," he said, the tone of his voice changing as his host took control, lost in his visions.

"Danyel," she said, threading her fingers through his long hair. "It has been so long."

Shau'ri felt his comforting weight settle upon her and closed her eyes, willingly losing herself in Amaunet's deception.

Shau'ri woke up, her heart pounding in her chest. Still lost in her dream, she looked around the room, her eyes seeing not the opulent and decadent furnishings of Apophis' palace, but the more sturdy and homier décor of Daniel's apartment.

Disgusted with how she'd fallen under Amaunet's spell, she slid out of bed, trying not to wake Daniel. She padded downstairs, desperately wishing that Daniel was on a mission and that she was alone in the house. She wanted to bathe, to wash the filth and memories from her body. She was ashamed at how easily she'd been tricked, how she'd been so desperate to make the nightmare end that she'd ignored her common sense, losing herself in the illusion.

That first night, Apophis and Amaunet had confused her. But not every night after that. No. The next several months were all her fault. She'd sought refuge in the fantasy, telling herself night after night that maybe the child she carried was her Danyel's, that he had really come to her, cared for her, loved her.

The lie became easier to believe when Apophis sent her back to Abydos and let her return to her father. The homespun garments that her demon so hated were like silk on her skin, comforting and warm. She lost herself in her chores, ignoring the finite time limit placed upon her by the child. Towards the end, she'd actually been able to convince herself that it was all a horrible dream. That she really was carrying Daniel's child and that he'd return to her.

What if he is Harcesis?

Doctor Fraiser's words echoed in her brain. Harcesis. She knew that term; she knew what it was. A child born of two goa'uld. That was why Heru'ur had wanted Hrabe. Not for the child and not to embarrass Apophis, he wanted all the knowledge legend said the child should have.

"They did horrible things to her," Daniel said, sitting beside her on the bench.

"What do you mean?" she asked. "She looks well." She looked across the yard, her eyes narrowing at the sight of the Tok'ra. She and the sholva were seated at another table, talking quietly between themselves. No, not sholva. Teal'c. His name was Teal'c. And she was Samantha, a Tok'ra by accident not by choice. She'd freed her from Amaunet. She had to remember that. Samantha was not the enemy, she was a friend.

"She didn't when she came back," Daniel said. "Shau'ri, there is a group here on Earth, called the NID. They…they don't like strangers. When they found out about Jolinar, they…took Sam."

"And they hurt her?"

"They did," he said sadly. "This is why I've told you to never go anywhere with anyone you don't know or unless I tell you to."

"Do you think they will come for me? Or for Hrabe?" she asked, alarmed at the possibility of being in danger even in this sanctuary.

"No, no," he reassured, reaching out to take her in his arms. "General Hammond's made it perfectly clear that you're off-limits. Hrabe too. You're in no danger. But it can't hurt to play things safe, now can it?"

Danger. He was in danger. Fear bubbled up in her chest as she hurriedly made her way upstairs and into Hrabe's room. Her son lay sleeping, one chubby fist crammed into his mouth. Her legs weak with relief, she sank down beside his crib, one arm snaking between the bars to rest on his small chest. He was safe, for now. But how much longer?

If this NID was really as powerful as Daniel thought they were, how would they react if they found out Captain Carter's supposition, if they thought that Hrabe was a Harcesis.

They would take him, kidnap him like Heru'ur was planning to do. No. Not her baby. It would not happen to her child.

She gently picked him up, murmuring to shush his protestations, and carried him back into her bedroom. She nestled the boy between her and Daniel. He would keep Hrabe safe, just like he'd done before.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I've found something I think you'll be interested in," the voice of his informant said, his tone disgustingly eager. It was amazing what a few thousand dollars could do for a man's loyalty.

"That's what you said last month when O'Neill was spouting an alien language," he said, not bothering to hide his contempt. These humans were beyond pathetic. And they seemed to come in two types. The greedy, self-centered individuals like his informant, and the overly moralistic, ready to die for their principals fools like Hammond and most of his staff.

"This is better than someone speaking an alien language." He fell silent, obviously enjoying drawing matters out.

"What?" he snapped wishing for a second that he wasn't hundreds of miles away and could strangle the little man with his bare hands.

"My fee?"

"Will pay for your funeral if you push me."

His informant sighed. "There's talk about the base, very hush-hush. They think they've found something. Does the term Harcesis mean anything to you?" he hurried to say, sensing his rising ire.

His heart lurched. "Where is it?" he asked, trying to figure out how he'd get access to the gate to get off world.

"It's here, on Earth," the informant said.

"I want every bit of information dropped in the usual place within twenty-four hours," he ordered.

"I don't think…"

"I'll double your fee, triple it if you make it in twelve," he interrupted.

"Aah, trip…ok, sure. I'll get right on it." His informant hung up the phone and he sat back, a satisfied smile creeping across his face.

This was a most opportune situation. He hadn't dared try to return home after failing to capture Jolinar. And now she was off limits to him. But this, this would more than appease his master.

He chuckled, wondering if the humans even knew the value of what they had.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Daniel walked through the halls of the SGC, fighting the uneasy feeling he'd had all day. For the first time in a long time, he hadn't wanted to leave Shau'ri and Robbie home while he came into work. General Hammond had been most understanding with his desire to work at home, but even that had it's limits, and today's briefing with three teams about their upcoming missions was a perfect example.

He couldn't expect these people to come to his home for the briefing, and Shau'ri didn't like coming onto the base, so he'd had to leave her at home.

"Daniel?" He turned to see Sam walking down the hall and he slowed, allowing her to catch up. "The colonel said you'd be in today," she said.

"Yeah, I've got some briefings," he said.

She nodded, falling into step beside him. "How's Shau'ri getting along?" she asked. "She looked a little...unsure at the picnic. Is everything ok?"

He sighed. "I don't know," he admitted. "For a while everything was fine but recently…" He stopped in the hall, turning to face her. "What can you tell me about her memories?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean…for a while it looked like she wasn't going to remember much, but…"

"You think she's remembering more," Sam interrupted. "It's possible. Daniel, the relationship between a host and symbiote is complicated. At first, Jolinar and I…we really didn't share much. All she wanted to do was go home and all I wanted to do was get her out of me. We didn't start to talk until later." She looked away, clearly dealing with uncomfortable memories. She looked back. "She still has her secrets. There are events and memories that she hasn't shown me. And there's part of my past that she's never looked into. We, we're almost like ….roommates I guess. We share but also each keep parts of ourselves private." She shrugged. "I don't know how it was with Amaunet and Shau'ri. It's possible that she remembers the last year almost like it's a bad dream. It's also possible that she doesn't remember any of it."

"How do you mean?" he asked.

"The symbiote can block memories in the host. Make it seem like nothing ever happened."

He shook his head. "I don't understand. How?"

"The symbiote has an incredible amount of control over the host. They can manipulate the host's perceptions, augment or dampen their vision and hearing. When we were…there," she paused, taking a breath. "Jolinar would…there was a room, in my mind and I'd go there and shut the door. And then I'd wait."

"Wait?"

"Wait for it to be over. Daniel, I only remember what happened because Jolinar let me remember. Shau'ri may not. It's also possible that Amaunet manipulated her perceptions. She may have confusing and contradictory memories. Have you thought about having her talk to anyone?"

Daniel shook his head. "No."

"It could help, Daniel. A blending is even more intimate than a marriage. Who knows what kind of mental stress Amaunet subjected Shau'ri to. She was a prisoner for over a year. That's bound to have some effect on her," she said.

"Yeah," he said.

"Maybe Janet knows someone," she suggested. "You should go talk to her."

"I think I will," he agreed, noticing that she didn't offer to counsel his wife. That didn't surprise him. Even though Sam had been instrumental in rescuing Shau'ri, the two women were not what he'd ever call friends. Sometimes he wondered if the millennia old disputes between the goa'uld and Tok'ra colored each woman's perceptions.

Amaunet and Jolinar had nothing but bad blood between them, exacerbated he was sure, by the feelings of both hosts. Jack had warned him not to be surprised if he noticed a little jealousy between the two women, more than likely from Shau'ri.

It didn't take an expert to know that his wife was going to have her confidence severely shaken by her experiences, and learning that Daniel had spent the last year in the company of an attractive woman like Sam, no matter how platonic it had been, was going to be hard on his wife.

"I gotta go," he said, glancing at his watch. "I'm briefing SG-8 in fifteen minutes."

"No problem. I'll catch up with you later." She turned, he guessed heading towards her lab. Making a note to talk to Janet before he went back home, he picked up the pace, knowing that he'd be late for the briefing if he tarried too much longer.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Shau'ri walked up the residential street, struggling a bit with the dual burdens of a stroller and Sparky's leash. It felt good to be able to get outside and enjoy the warmth of the Colorado sun. This place was not as warm as Abydos, but sometimes she could pretend.

She'd woken up this morning; feeling relieved that she hadn't voiced her fears to Daniel. Strange things had been happening more often lately. She'd been remembering more and more of her time with Amaunet, sometimes just recalling faint images, other times, having memories so vivid she felt like she'd returned to her past.

That is what she blamed her fear on, reliving those last few terrifying minutes in Apophis' palace when Amaunet had found the body of her husband, her god. The horror that she was alone in the universe, easy prey for any other goa'uld to come and capture her, warring with Shau'ri's relief that the man was dead.

That fear had given away to anger as she sought out who had murdered her husband, seeking revenge only to be captured. Those last few minutes were the most confusing to her, the memories and feelings of both host and symbiote meshing and warring with each other.

Several car doors slammed and she looked up. This area was normally very quiet, Shau'ri one of just a few people that didn't work, so traffic was at a minimum. She watched as several men piled out of two vehicles, some staying by the street, others walking up to her house and pounding on the door.

"No one's here, sir," one of the men reported.

"She can't have gone far," the one in charge said, his features masked by sunglasses and a blue hat. "Get me inside and get the vans out of here. We wouldn't want to spook her."

"Remember Shau'ri. Don't go with anyone you don't know."

"The NID, they don't like strangers."

"They hurt her, Shau'ri. They almost killed her."

Hrabe giggled and reached for Sparky's tail. That's what they wanted, they were after her son. Her heart pounding in her chest, she turned, struggling with the stroller and disappeared back around the corner. She had to find somewhere safe; somewhere she could hide until she could find Daniel. He would protect her. She had to find her husband.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam sat in her lab, studying the device setting on the table. 'O'Neill made this?' Jolinar asked.

'Yeah. He drew the most detailed schematics for the DHD that I've ever seen too. Saved Teal'c and Major Castleman.'

'It looks oddly familiar,' the symbiote said. 'But I can't place it.'

Sam shook her head. 'Neither can I. And I haven't been able to get it to work again either. Which makes no sense at all.' She studied the small device, tracing her fingers over each connection. The power source was still there, everything was exactly like how the colonel had made it, but it refused to work.

'Colonel O'Neill remembers nothing of where he went?' Jolinar asked, trying to remember any alien races that were advanced enough to fix the man's brain, yet reclusive enough not to want anyone to know whom they were.

'Nothing. At least, nothing that he'll tell any of us.'

'Maybe…' The klaxons went off, breaking up the conversation. 'There is no one due back,' Jolinar said.

'Yeah,' Sam agreed. She got to her feet, her curiosity driving her forward. 'Maybe it's dad?' she suggested as they got onto the elevator.

'It is possible,' Jolinar said. 'However I was under the impression that Selmac had missions to carry out.'

'I guess we'll find out,' Sam said as they walked into the control room. "Sir," she acknowledged, seeing that the rest of her team had beaten her there.

"Aah there you are. Some friends of yours dropped by for a visit," Jack said, jerking his thumb towards the gateroom. "Anyone you know?"

She looked through the glass. "Oh my god," she muttered. "Garshaw."

"Who?" Daniel asked.

"The woman's Garshaw, she's the leader of the Tok'ra."

"You speak of Garshaw of Beloit?" Teal'c asked.

Sam nodded. "Yeah. The man is Cordesh. He's a member of the council. I wonder what they're doing here?"

"Umm…They told Hammond they're here to take you back," Jack said.

"What?" Sam blurted out. "No. They can't. Colonel?"

"I don't know," Jack shrugged.

'Jolinar?' Sam asked. 'What's going on? They can't do that can they? They can't make us go back.' The symbiote remained silent. 'Jolinar,' Sam pressed.

'They can,' she said softly. 'They can.'

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"The council agreed to respect my host's wishes and allow us to remain on

Earth," Jolinar said, fighting to keep her host's voice even.

"That was before," Garshaw said. "Jolinar, in the past few months the Tok'ra have suffered grievous losses." "

"Many of our bases have been attacked and several of our agents compromised," Cordesh spoke up, his eyes darting around the room as if he was trying to commit every detail to memory.

SG-1, Hammond and the two Tok'ra were seated around the briefing room table, the tension between the two parties almost a physical force.

"I don't see what that has to do with Carter going back with you," Jack said. "Let's be realistic, we're talking a war here. One person, more or less, is not going to make a difference."

"This is not simply a matter of the number of personnel," Garshaw said. "Our population has always been small." She looked around the room, finally staring Sam in the eyes. "What we require is access to intelligence that Jolinar has."

"Of what do you speak?" Teal'c asked.

'Oh no,' Jolinar moaned.

'What?' Sam asked.

'Not there, please gods not there.'

'Jols? What?' Sam could feel the symbiote's fear and terror building, her dread settling like a stone in the pit of Sam's stomach. A nauseous feeling crept over her and she swallowed, struggling to keep control. 'Please, what's she talking about?'

'About a year ago we successfully infiltrated Sokar's ranks, gathering a lot of intelligence about him and the locations of his spies. We were captured and….' She broke off abruptly, mentally slamming down a door, locking those memories away. 'I will not go back there. I refused before and I refuse now. Nothing I know is any good any longer anyway. It's…I won't go,' she stated.

'Ok,' Sam soothed. 'You won't go, WE won't go. I promise you, we'll stay here.'

'You cannot promise that. Your people want and need the Tok'ra alliance. If Garshaw presses it…'

'General Hammond will not betray us. Both he and Jack promised to protect us, and they will,' Sam said.

"Jolinar spent many months in the company of Sokar," Garshaw continued. "She was instrumental in orchestrating an altercation between him and Cronos, the resulting battle resulted in Cronos losing a large portion of his forces."

"And in Jolinar and Rosha nearly dying in Sokar's prison," Sam said, throwing out the one fragment of memory she'd gathered before Jolinar blocked her out. "Not to mention that Cronos set the Ashrak after them in revenge, an assassin that's still out there, by the way."

"That is a risk all operatives take," Cordesh said.

"Spoken by the man that hasn't left the compound in years," Jolinar spat.

"So," Jack interrupted. "You're telling us that all of a sudden you've decided that you need some of Jolinar's memories and that Carter needs to go back with you, to live with you, so you can have access 24/7 to intelligence that is over a year old and more than likely worthless. It doesn't add up."

"Unless it's just an excuse," Daniel said.

"Doctor Jackson?" Hammond asked.

"Well, think about it, sir. Even I know that intelligence that old isn't reliable. There has to be another reason."

"You said that you have suffered repeated attacks in recent months?" Teal'c asked.

"Yes," Garshaw confirmed.

"Then is it not possible that you desire Captain Carter and Jolinar to return to you not to gather intelligence, but rather to eliminate a potential security breach?"

"You think I've been betraying you to the goa'uld?" Sam asked. Garshaw and Cordesh shared a look confirming their guilt.

"Captain Carter has not been in a position to reveal any information to any parties, especially the goa'uld," Teal'c said.

"I've only been off world three times since I blended with Jolinar," Sam said. "And two of those planets were uninhabited."

"Is this true?" Garshaw asked.

"She's not your spy," Jack said.

"Excuse me, sir."

"We're in the middle of a briefing, sergeant," Hammond said as they all turned to see Sergeant Davis standing at the top of the stairs.

"Yes, sir, I know. And I apologize. You left standing orders that Doctor Jackson was to be notified immediately if anyone contacted him about his wife."

"Shau'ri? What's wrong?" Daniel got go his feet.

"I don't know, sir. One of your neighbors called. She saw your wife leave for her morning walk. While she was gone, she saw some men come by. They tried to get into the house…"

"What?"

"She said that they set up what she described as an ambush. She called the police but the men got rid of them somehow."

"Where's Shau'ri?" Daniel asked, grabbing the slip of paper out of Davis' hand.

"She said she never saw her come back from her walk, sir."

"General," Daniel pleaded. "We have to go find her."

"Did this woman describe the men?" Jack asked.

"She didn't give a lot of detail in her note, sir. Just described them as men in blue suits."

"Sounds like the NID to me," Jack said.

"Shau'ri? Are you talking about Amaunet? The mate of Apophis?" Garshaw asked.

"You say you are our ally but you harbor a goa'uld," Cordesh said, his eyes flaring.

"Amaunet is deceased," Teal'c said. "Only her host survives."

"The NID's supposed to leave Shau'ri alone," Daniel said.

'They know,' Jolinar said.

'What?'

'They know about Hrabe.'

'How? No one outside of this room knows?'

'Incorrect. Doctor Fraiser knows and it is not unreasonable for word to have spread among her staff.'

"Captain Carter?" Hammond asked, pulling her from her internal conversation.

Sam shook her head. "Sir, the NID's supposed to leave Shau'ri alone, but no one ever said anything about Robbie." She cast a glance at the two Tok'ra, cursing the timing of the Sargent's interruption. They'd done their best not to tell the Tok'ra about Shau'ri's presence, fearing that the Tok'ra would want to interrogate the woman, search her memories for any information about Apophis.

'For better or worse, the cat is out of the bag,' Jolinar said.

"What would they want with a baby?" Daniel asked.

"Who is Robbie?" Garshaw asked.

"Hrabe is Shau'ri's child," Teal'c answered.

"This child was conceived while Amaunet still possessed the host?" Garshaw asked.

"Yeah, so?" Daniel asked, slightly defensive about a slur against his wife.

"And you did not think that this was important for us to know?" Garshaw asked Sam.

Sam shook her head. "It's just a legend. I couldn't risk a child's life on a barely remembered story."

"What story?" Daniel asked. The other members of SG-1 shared a glance, silently admitting their conspiracy. "What they hell is going on?" Daniel demanded.

Sam spoke up. "Among the Tok'ra there is a legend, that if two blended humans have a child, a human child, that that child will possess all the knowledge of the two goa'uld that bore it. We believe that Hrabe is one of these children."

Daniel shook his head. "I don't get it. What's the big deal?"

"Hrabe will possess all the knowledge of Apophis and Amaunet and that of all the hosts of every goa'uld in that lineage."

"So, he's smart."

"He also possesses a Goa'uld's desire for conquest and power," Jolinar said.

"In the wrong hands, such a child could be a most formidable weapon," Teal'c said.

"If you knew this, why the hell didn't you say anything earlier?" he demanded.

"I…"

"We didn't want to make things harder," Jack interrupted Sam. "If you suspected that something was wrong with Robbie, you would have treated him differently."

"You don't know that."

"There is also the possibility that Shau'ri may have knowledge about Hrabe being a Harcesis," Jolinar said. "If we told you, then you would be in the position of lying to her."

"How long were you going to keep it a secret?" he demanded.

"We were going to inform you as soon as we knew something definitive," Hammond said.

"The blood tests," Daniel said.

"Yeah," Jack confirmed.

"Would this time not be better spent in ascertaining the location of Shau'ri and Hrabe," Teal'c spoke up, interrupting their conversation.

"Excellent point, Teal'c," Hammond agreed. "Doctor Jackson, does Shau'ri have any friends, anywhere she'd go if she was scared."

Daniel shook his head. "No, General. All she really knows is home and the SGC."

'She'd seek refuge here,' Jolinar said.

'Why? She barely tolerates us.'

'Daniel is here. Daniel she trusts,' Jolinar said simply.

"She'll come to you, Daniel," Sam said out loud.

"She's on foot, with a baby," Jack said, accepting the theory.

"And Sparky," Daniel said. "She takes the dog on their walks too," he explained.

"OK," Jack said. "Your place is about eight miles away."

"She would more than likely travel a straight line," Teal'c said. "That is the most expedient path."

"So we go to Daniel's house and make our way here," Sam said.

"No." Jack shook his head. "If we can figure it out, so can the NID. We need to get ahead of her and intercept her. Get them here where they're safe and figure out the rest later."

"I can send out teams…" Hammond offered.

"No, sir," Daniel said. "I've told her never to trust anyone but a member of my team. If she sees other soldiers, she'll run."

"We'll split up," Jack said. "Carter, you and Teal'c make your way from the SGC to Daniel's house, Daniel and I will work the other way," Jack ordered, getting to his feet. "General?" he asked, belatedly getting the man's permission.

"Go," Hammond ordered. "We'll wait here for you."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Shau'ri stood on the street corner, frowning at the small sign. Bus stop. Daniel had told her about this, a form of public transportation, soon after she'd come to Earth. He said they traveled all over the city. They could take her to Daniel.

The large lumbering vehicle stopped and opened its doors. She pushed the stroller forward, struggling a bit with its bulk.

"Whoa, lady. You can't bring that on here," the driver said.

"What? I need this for my child," she said.

"Stroller's not a problem, but I can't allow the dog," he said. "Not unless it's a service animal."

She looked down at Sparky, standing calmly beside her, his pink tongue lolling out of his mouth. "He is tame. He will not harm anyone."

"I'm sorry. It's the rules. My bosses find out, I'll get fired," he said apologetically.

Unwilling to fight him and equally unwilling to abandon the dog, she pulled back, allowing the bus to continue upon its way. She scanned her surroundings, her eyes catching the familiar shape of Cheyenne Mountain, the large number of antennas and towers setting it apart from all other mountains around her. It was not that far away. They could make it there.

"Come, Sparky," she said, tightening her grip on the dog's leash. "Let us go find Daniel."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam slowly drove down the street, her attention divided between navigating the car and looking for Shau'ri. They were driving through a residential neighborhood, the streets and lawns just starting to fill up as children got out of school and made their way home.

Daniel said Shau'ri always went for her walk around noon, which meant that she'd been missing for about three hours.

"You did not inform the Tok'ra of Shau'ri's presence on Earth," Teal'c said, more a statement than a question.

"No," Sam replied, barely sparing him a glance. "Teal'c," she continued on when he remained silent. "They'd want to use her, just like the NID does."

"With the death of Apophis, it is doubtful that her information would be of much use."

"I know that. And you know that. I mean, the most useful thing we might get from her would be the location of a few strongholds or outposts. None of which are any good to us, or anyone else unless they were wanting to conquer those places for themselves."

They fell silent for a few more minutes, both of them closely studying the pedestrians they saw. More than once, Sam's heart lurched when she caught sight of a stroller, only to realize that it wasn't her quarry.

"Once we recover Shau'ri, will you be returning to the Tok'ra?" he asked quietly.

Sam paused for a moment then shook her head. "No. I'm staying here. WE'RE staying here."

"Several months ago, Jolinar wanted nothing more than to return to her people," he reminded.

"Several months ago, Jolinar thought she had people to go back to," Sam said.

"Are not two members of the Tok'ra waiting our return at the SGC?"

"I will not go back with them," Jolinar stated, smoothly making the transition from host to symbiote. "Teal'c, for years there has been a feeling among several members of the Tok'ra, that our rebellion is dying, losing its focus. Betrayal, an act that was once rare, has become almost commonplace. The Tau'ri have accomplished more in the last couple of years than the Tok'ra have in millennia."

"If the Tok'ra withdraw their alliance, will you not lose your status as Ambassador?"

"They won't do that," Jolinar said. "They need us, more than they'll ever admit."

"Thus far, the Tok'ra have been most derisive of Tau'ri technology."

"They don't want our tech, Teal'c," Sam said. "They want us."

"Hosts."

"Yeah," she confirmed. "Teal'c, usually the only hosts the Tok'ra have access to are the dying or the sick of various subjugated and primitive races. The symbiote spends half its time educating the host, bringing it up to speed. With a Tau'ri host, they don't have to do that. They've already got more knowledge than some Tok'ra do. Plus a better spirit."

"A spirit?"

"All too often, the Tok'ra are fighting the Goa'uld in hosts that were raised to worship those Goa'uld as gods. There's a lot of conflicting emotions. Not only does the Tok'ra ask for use of the host's body, they undermine their most basic beliefs as well. In extreme cases, the Tok'ra is unable to continue the fight because the inner conflict is too great. With Tau'ri, they don't have that."

"And the Tok'ra council knows this?"

"After three months with my dad, they know," she said with a small smile. "Let's try up Chinhook street," she said, turning the wheel. "It's quieter."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Colonel Harry Maybourne sat in the back seat of his car, plotting his men's reported positions on a map as they called in. He cursed the fact that they'd missed the woman at her home, it would have been so much easier.

"We still have no sign of her, sir," Captain Marcos reported.

"It's a female, a baby and a dog," Harry spat. "What's so damned difficult about that?" he demanded.

"You said we needed to be discrete, sir," the man said. "If we could cordon off the area, it'd go much faster."

"Maybe I should call the local police and have them do your jobs for you," Harry said, snapping off the radio with and angry twist. This wasn't working; it was taking too long. And he knew, the longer it took, the greater the chances that Hammond would get wind of it and find a way to get her to the relative safety of the SGC.

He couldn't let that happen. If his suspicions were right, that bitch Tok'ra already suspected what the child was, and he couldn't let her get her hands on him. If he couldn't have him, no one would.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hrabe fussed and Shau'ri sighed. She pushed the stroller near a bench, gratefully sinking down. She picked the boy up, bouncing him on her knee in an effort to sooth him. He was hungry. She was hungry. It was now evening and she doubted that they'd be able to make it to Cheyenne Mountain before it got dark. Daniel would have arrived home by now and would have found her gone. What was he thinking? She hoped he didn't think she'd deserted him. She wished she'd had time to contact him. She'd passed several telephones on her walk, but lacking any money, she hadn't been able to make a call.

"Ssh, ssh," she whispered, rocking him a bit. She tried to think if he had anything in the stroller for him to eat. Sparky sat at her feet, panting openly. He was thirsty too she knew.

She heard some children playing and looked across the street. There was a small park there, a few picnic tables and some playground equipment. And most importantly, a water fountain.

Too tired to wrestle the stroller across the street, she stood up, hitching Hrabe up on her hip. "Stay," she ordered the dog. "I will be right back."

She grabbed a small cup, planning to use it for her and Hrabe, then allow Sparky to get a drink from it and started across the street. She took a deep draught for herself, then carefully held the cup for her son, knowing that the water would soothe him in two ways, quenching his thirst and also fooling his stomach for a little while into thinking he'd eaten.

She heard barking and turned, ready to shush the dog. Her heart lurched when she saw two men in blue suits standing by the stroller, both looking around intently. Suddenly panicking, she turned her back, dropping the cup as she hurried across the park, seeking some sort of refuge in the low bushes.

Her eyes caught a glimpse of the mountain; it's flashing beacons and the safety they promised so close, yet so very far away.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam pulled the car over to the curb, squinting to see through the fading light. "Captain Carter?"

Sam shook her head. "I'm not sure. Something…" She turned off the ignition, getting out of the car. They were parked on the edge of a small park. There were very few people around, most of the children apparently home eating their dinner.

'Jols?' She felt the symbiote take control, pushing her senses to the limit. Almost in a trance, she felt herself walk forward. There was something there…something familiar.

She barely perceived Teal'c walking at her side, his vigilance compensating for her lack of attention.

"Captain Carter?" he asked softly, wanting to know, but not to disturb.

"A symbiote," Jolinar whispered. "I sense the presence of another. Shau'ri?" she called. A faint sound reached her ears and her eyes flew open.

"There," Teal'c said, confirming her perception.

They both hurried forward, Sam following the faint tingle washing down her spine. A bush rustled and a figure dashed out, running away from them. "Shau'ri! It's us. It's ok!" Sam called, trying to calm the clearly terrified woman.

"Look out!" Jolinar warned as a heavy weight slammed into her side. She fell, her mind belatedly registering the gunshot. Teal'c landed on top of her, his large bulk forcing the air from her lungs. She struggled to free herself, Shau'ri's screams mixed with Hrabe's terrified cries.

'He's been shot,' Jolinar diagnosed.

'Who?'

'I don't know. I…'

"It must be my lucky day," a familiar voice drawled as a figure stood over them, one hand holding a pistol, the other a screaming child. "All my quarry in one place at the same time."

"Maybourne?" Sam gasped, struggling to push an unconscious, or maybe even dead, Teal'c off her so she could move.

'He's a goa'uld,' Jolinar said.

'What? How the hell did he get snaked? He's never been off-world?'

'I don't…'

"My lord will reward me greatly," he said, moving closer.

"NO! GIVE ME MY SON!" Shau'ri screamed, throwing herself at him. Without even pausing, he fired and she fell back, landing in a crumpled heap in the grass.

"So many targets, so little time." He moved forward, squatting down close to her, but not close enough for her to reach. "The reward is much less for your death than to return you alive, however I believe he will make up for it." He gestured towards a screaming Hrabe with the pistol. "Kree shak, Jolinar. By decree of the Goa'uld System Lords, you will die with dishonor." He held up the pistol. "This is not as much fun as the hara'kash, but it will serve."

Sam's eyes grew wide as they focussed on the barrel of the pistol, his fingers tightening on the trigger. 'I'm sorry,' Jolinar said. 'So sorry…'

There was a flash of white light, and then she knew no more.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"What's that?" Daniel asked, pointing through the windshield at a large number of flashing lights.

"Don't know," Jack said, pulling over to the curb. They got out of the car, melting in with the gathering crowd. There were several police cars and ambulances parked around a small park. Held back by a length of yellow police tape, Jack squinted, trying to see what was going on.

"Horrible, just horrible," a woman standing next to him said.

"What happened?"

"And this was such a good neighborhood too," she commented.

"It was a shooting," a young man said.

"Is everyone ok?" Jack asked, his heart lurching a bit. Something told him that this wasn't a coincidence.

"That's the problem. We heard the shots, but there's no one there."

"What?" Jack turned to face the man. "They got away?"

"I don't know how. From what I've heard, there's too much blood. No one walked away from that."

"Jack!" Jack turned, following Daniel's voice. His friend was on the other side of the street, standing by a small bench. "They were here," he said as Jack drew near, his eyes alight with hope. He pointed to the stroller, his hand absently stroking Sparky's head. "They can't be too far away. Robbie's too heavy for her to carry too far." Jack looked at the park, suddenly knowing that the shooting in the park and his missing friends was connected. "What's going on over there?"

Jack sighed, running his hand through his hair. "Shooting…with no victims," he said.

"What?" He looked down at the stroller, then his eyes darted back across the street. "What if they got them?"

Jack shrugged. "I don't know, Daniel."

"Jack, there's four people on Earth that the NID would kill to get, and two of them were here," he reminded needlessly. "Have you heard from Sam and Teal'c lately?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sam slowly opened her eyes, staring at the metallic looking ceiling above her. 'Jols?'

'Yes.'

'Are we dead?'

'I don't know.' Slightly disconcerted to find her symbiote puzzled, Sam pushed herself up, taking stock of the room. The walls were a slightly shiny black metal, plain and featureless. The floor she was lying on was just as plain and slightly cool. 'It's a cell,' Jolinar said.

'Yeah, but where?' She sensed another presence and looked behind her. "Oh my God, Teal'c." She crawled over to his side. Her friend was lying flat on his back on the floor. His hat was askew and she could see the sticky stain of blood on his chest. "Teal'c?" She shook him gently, relieved to find his skin warm. Her fingers fumbled with his shirt, trying to unbutton the heavy material. 'We need to get him help.'

'Samantha…'

'He won't die, I won't let him die,' Sam said, her hands shaking. She screamed out loud when one of his hands rose from his side, stilling her frantic gestures.

His eyes opened and he sat up. He brought his other hand up, exploring the wound. "I was shot," he said.

"Oh God," she muttered, wrapping her hands around his neck and hugging him. He sat there for a second, clearly shocked, then brought up one hand to pat her on her back. "If you ever do that again, I will kill you," she threatened, pulling back.

"I shall endeavor not to die again," he said. "We are not on Earth," he stated, getting to his feet.

'He's right. We're on a ship.'

'Goa'uld? I don't remember rings.'

'Not goa'uld.'

"It's a ship. Jolinar doesn't recognize it," Sam reported, also standing up.

Almost on cue, a door melted out of the wall, opening into the corridor. She shared a glance with Teal'c. "It appears we shall soon discover whose ship this is." She followed him out of the room, both eager to discover whom their host was.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Thor watched his monitors, noting that all of the humans were now awake. Casting a glance at the unconscious man in the corner of the room, he manipulated the walls, funneling the human and Jaffa towards him. They were the key, he thought, to the puzzle he'd found on Earth. The Jaffa he recognized as Teal'c, ally of the Tau'ri and one that had aided in liberating the Cimmerians from Heru'ur. And he had apparently given his life in a vain attempt to save the blended woman. This led him to be concerned that perhaps Earth was being overrun by the Goa'uld, a fate he could not allow.

The human and the Jaffa entered the room, standing protectively close to each other. "Umm, hello," the woman said.

"Greetings," Thor replied. "Please state your identity and the reason you are on this planet."

She looked quickly at her companion then stepped forward. "My name is Captain Samantha Carter, of Earth."

"And the creature within you?"

She blinked and nodded her head. "I am Jolinar of Malkshur," she replied, the symbiote clearly in control.

"I am not familiar with that name. Which System Lord do you serve?"

"I serve no System Lord. I am a member of the Tok'ra," she replied.

Thor paused, processing this newest bit of information. "I was not aware that the Tok'ra and the Tau'ri were allied."

"It is a recent occurrence," Teal'c said.

"If you are Tok'ra, who is this?" he asked, gesturing towards Maybourne. The human lay where he'd left him, asleep, a precaution Thor had felt necessary since he'd been holding a weapon that had already harmed two people and was in the process of murdering a third when he'd transported them to the Beliskner.

"He's an Ashrak," Jolinar replied. "Sent to kill me."

"If his target was you, why did he harm the woman?"

"Shau'ri? She's here?"

Thor nodded. "Yes."

"He desires possession of her son," Teal'c said.

Thor sighed, some pieces of the puzzle falling into place. "He wishes to control the Harcesis."

The Tok'ra looked surprised. "You know about that?"

"That is why I am here," he informed them. "We acquired knowledge of the child's presence from Colonel O'Neill's mind when we removed the knowledge of the Ancients from his brain."

"He didn't know about Robbie being a Harcesis then," the woman said, her voice different in tone.

"O'Neill was aware of the circumstances of the child's conception and birth," Teal'c reminded.

"Yes," Thor said. "We became aware of the possibility of his existence and journeyed here to investigate the situation."

"So he IS Harcesis?" Carter asked.

Thor refused to confirm her supposition. "If this child is a Harcesis, what do you plan to do with him?" he asked instead.

"We want to fix him," Carter said. "He can't be allowed to keep that knowledge. We'd never be able to control him."

"Then you do not wish to gain access to his secrets?" Thor asked, surprised at her response.

"The risks would far outweigh the benefits," Teal'c said.

"He's too dangerous," the woman said. "We were hoping to confirm that he was Harcesis and see if we could train him to control his impulses."

"And if you could not control him?" Thor asked. "If his thirst for power is too great for him to overcome, what will you do then?"

The woman's eyes flared. "If we could not control him, we would sacrifice him to save the planet," Jolinar said.

Satisfied with her answer, he pressed a control on his chair, transporting the woman and her child into the room.

"Shau'ri."

The woman looked around the room, still unsure and frightened as she'd been ever since she'd woken up. Her eyes settled on the Ashrak, her arms tightening around the child. "Hataka," she muttered, stepping away from him.

"It's ok, Shau'ri. He can't hurt you," Carter reassured her, both she and the Jaffa stepping forward.

"He took my son," she accused.

"I know. I know. But he can't hurt you now," Carter said.

"Are you aware of what your son is?" Thor asked her.

"He is Harcesis," she replied. "I remember my demon calling him such."

"Do you wish for him to remain so?" Thor asked her.

"You can do that?" Carter asked.

"You can remove the evil from him?" Shau'ri asked.

"If that is what you wish," Thor answered.

"Will he be safe then? Safe from men like him?" She gestured towards the man in the corner.

"They won't have a reason to hunt him," Carter answered.

"Will it harm him?" Shau'ri asked Thor.

"No."

"Then do it," she ordered. "Remove the evil my demon left in him."

"Bring him here," Thor said. She complied, carrying Hrabe over to the small alien. He reached down and picked up a small round object from the console, holding it over Hrabe's head. The child muttered, mesmerized by the action and the warm blue light emitted by the stone. The light snapped off and he reached out one chubby arm, seeking to touch it.

"It is done," Thor said, setting down the stone. "The child no longer possesses the knowledge of the goa'uld."

"What about Maybourne?" Teal'c asked. "He is still possessed by the Ashrak."

Carter looked to her companion, apparently torn. Finally she sighed. "Can you remove it?"

"Yes," Thor answered. "However to do so without putting him in another host would result in the death of the symbiote."

"And that's a bad thing?" she muttered. "He was sent by Cronos. What if you returned him, in stasis, to his master?"

"He has failed in his task. Cronos will not be pleased," Thor said.

"Indeed," Teal'c said.

"That's not your fault," Carter said. "All you're doing is returning him home. His failure is between him and his master."

"And the host?" Thor asked.

Carter looked to Teal'c. "I have an idea."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jack walked through the park, his flashlight augmenting the faint light from a nearby street lamp. Whatever had happened, it had to have happened here, he thought. They'd found Carter and Teal'c's car parked on the other side of the park. It and the presence of Shau'ri's stroller confirmed that the mysterious gunfight had likely involved them.

Daniel was walking around, leading Sparky, hoping for the dog to give him some clue. The police had left about an hour ago, so baffled by the evidence that they just took their samples, shot a few pictures and departed.

His friend was growing more and more frantic, his concern for his wife and adopted son nearly overwhelming him. "This doesn't make any sense, Jack," he said. "People don't just vanish into thin air."

A brilliant light assaulted his eyes and Jack instinctively ducked, his hand going to the pistol tucked in the small of his back. He blinked furiously, struggling to clear his vision. Sparky barked, running past Jack. "Don't shoot," a familiar voice said.

"Shau'ri!" He heard Daniel shout.

"What the hell?" He aimed his flashlight towards the center of the park, surprised when it revealed the two missing members of his team and the fugitive Abydonian. "Carter? Teal'c?"

"Colonel, it's ok," Carter reassured him. "It's us."

Jack stood up, striding over to the small group. "You guys ok?" he asked, frowning as the flashlight revealed bloodstains on all of their clothes.

"Yeah, we're fine, now," she answered. "It was Maybourne, sir," she said. "He was after Shau'ri and Robbie."

"Where is he?" Daniel asked, his arm wrapped possessively around his wife.

"We had Thor drop him off at Area 51," Sam answered.

"You just let him go?" Jack asked incredulously.

"I would not say that, O'Neill," Teal'c answered, a satisified near grin on his face.

"Aah, Jack," Daniel said. "I think we're about to get some company."

Jack strained his ears, picking out the faint sound of sirens. "Yeah," he answered.

"Colonel?"

"The last little fracas didn't go unnoticed," Jack replied. "You two, get back to the mountain, now. We'll meet you there," he ordered.

Sam nodded and they split up, each hurrying to their cars, eager to avoid more questions that they couldn't answer.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"How do you think an Ashrak got here?" Jacob asked, sitting beside Sam on the balcony of her apartment. They'd both attended a party at Jack's house, celebrating Hrabe's cure.

After the party had broken up, the two Carters had retreated to Sam's apartment, intent upon spending a little time together before Jacob returned to the Tok'ra.

"He must have been on Nasyia and been brought through the gate with the rest of the refugees," Sam answered. "General Hammond did some digging. One of the SF's was abruptly reassed to Area 51, where he just dropped off the face of the Earth. If the Ashrak got into him, then either went to or was taken to Area 51, then he could have gotten into Maybourne," she said with a small shrug. "Thor scanned the SGC and Area 51 and didn't find any more goa'uld, so that's good news."

'You mean other than Maybourne,' Jolinar reminded.

'Or what's left of Maybourne,' Sam said. 'I wonder if they gave him our old cell?'

'Does your father realize just how vindictive you are?' the symbiote asked curiously.

'Where do you think I got it from,' she replied, taking a sip of her wine. She sighed internally. 'Maybe we should have sent him to the SGC,' she said.

'Remorse? For him?'

'Possession by a goa'uld was a fate I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy,' Sam said, regretting her words when she felt Jolinar wince.

Jacob nodded, taking a sip of his wine. The sun was setting over the mountains, casting a ruddy red glow on the low clouds. The air was starting to cool, but felt good against their skin as the stone and brick of her balcony radiated the day's heat back at them. "Garshaw told me that you're staying here," he said, broaching the topic with his normal grace and tact. She'd been waiting for this ever since they'd returned to the SGC to discover that Garshaw and Cordesh had returned to the Tok'ra, Jacob arriving in their stead.

'Selmac needs to work on him,' Jolinar said.

'She already has, trust me, this is mellow,' Sam said. "No, I'm not going back," she said aloud.

"They can use you, you know," he said. "They've been getting their asses kicked."

"I know," she said.

"Is this your decision, or Jolinar's?"

"Both," she said honestly. "Dad, this is my home now. These are my friends. I can't leave them."

He nodded, accepting her words. "And Jolinar?"

"She doesn't want to go back. She has nothing to go back to."

"What about fighting the goa'uld?"

"She can fight the goa'uld from here. WE can fight the goa'uld from here," she said.

"And later?" he asked. "You know, you're probably going to watch them die, if not in the war, then from simple old age. Even Teal'c won't live more than forty years or so," Jacob said.

"So will you," she shot back at him. "Unless the Stargate Program gets declassified, eventually both of us will have to 'die' here on Earth. Maybe then Jolinar will feel like returning."

He nodded, getting to his feet and walking to the railing, his eyes fixed on the fading daylight. "I'm glad," he finally said.

"What?" she asked, getting up to join him.

'This is a surprise,' Jolinar said.

'Tell me about it.'

"I said I'm glad," he repeated.

She shook her head, frowning. "Whoa, who are you and what have you done with my dad?" she asked. He raised his eyebrows in question. "Where's the guilt trip? The 'trust me, I know what I'm talking about' lecture?"

"Ask Selmac," he replied. "Don't get me wrong, kid. I'd love to have you where I can keep an eye on you, but you're safer here."

"What do you mean?"

"The Tok'ra have changed since you left them. They're being torn apart from within, suspicion and distrust eating away at bonds forged millennia ago. We've got at least one traitor among us, probably more. The energy we used to put into destroying the Goa'uld is now being spent trying find out who the traitors are, or hell, for simple survival." He turned, setting down his wine glass and laying his hands on her shoulders. "I'm glad you're staying here, with your friends. O'Neill seems to be a good CO."

"He is dad," she said. "They're good friends."

He nodded, satisfied with her answer. "Then you stay with them. I'll smooth it over with the Council."

She settled into his arms, losing herself in his quiet strength, grateful beyond words to Selmac for saving his life. Things had changed so much in the past few months. Her dad was alive, his eyes alight with a new purpose, replacing the resignation and sadness she was used to seeing.

Daniel had Shau'ri back, the haunted look in his eyes replaced by joy and amazement as they worked together to raise Hrabe. The Tok'ra and Tau'ri were allies and she thought that the colonel's association with the Asgard could only result in good. She and Teal'c were safe from the NID and Maybourne, if the man was still alive. And for the first time in over a year, the battle with the goa'uld no longer seemed to be an insurmountable, impossible situation, but tinged with hope. Hope that they would win and hope that they would all survive to celebrate that victory.

Fin


End file.
